


A Next Generation Werewolf

by princesskiwifruit



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Harry Potter and the Cursed Child Spoilers, Hogwarts, M/M, No Underage Sex, Teacher-Student Relationship, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2018-10-22 13:02:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10697562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princesskiwifruit/pseuds/princesskiwifruit
Summary: After being bitten by one of his clients, Teddy Lupin is forced to resign as head of the Werewolf Support Service and instead gets a position at Hogwarts as Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Harry wants him to keep an eye on Albus and Scorpius after what happened with the time turner, but this turns out to be a bit more emotionally complicated than Teddy anticipated. Meanwhile, the ten Weasley-children currently attending Hogwarts keep Teddy busy with Roxanne living up to her family's reputation, Louis still being angry at Teddy for breaking up with his sister and James constantly trying to seduce his new teacher.





	1. Bitten

The Ministry was almost empty. Only the worst workaholics were left, stuck with paperwork in their offices. Harry had just stuck his head in to wish Teddy a good and quiet night, before going home.  
“Say hi to everyone from me,” Teddy told him. Harry waved as he left to show he’d heard.  
Shortly afterwards the first clients came trickling in. They all took their last dose of Wolfsbane for this cycle. Teddy checked their names against his list to make sure they’d all had all their doses, before showing them into the large room where the Goblin Liaison Office usually held their conferences. Now, however, the tables and chairs were gone, replaced by cushions and blankets randomly littering the floor. He’d never been very tidy.  
They sat down, most leaning against the wall. All of them looking pale and tired. They didn’t talk much to each other and the voices that were heard sounded tense and strained.  
“Anyone hungry?” Teddy asked, offering a tray of sandwiches around. Some of them took one.  
When he’d made sure that everyone on the list was present, he closed the door and sat down next to a young man, not much older then he himself was. Noah, who worked together with him at the Werewolf Support Center.  
“Good turn-out tonight, isn’t it?” he asked him.  
Noah looked around the room. “You’ve recruited a lot of new ones,” he said appreciatively. “If you keep this going, the werewolves are going to die out.”  
Teddy smiled. “That’s the plan. No offense.”  
Noah snorted. “I didn’t choose this. I certainly don’t wish it on anyone else.”  
Silence settled over the room as moonrise came closer. Teddy waited with them, as always. He would make sure everyone transformed without complications and then try to get some sleep. He’d have a lot of sore and cranky people to take care of tomorrow.  
He’d been doing this for years now, so he wasn’t bothered at all when about three dozen people around him started to transform into wolves.  
He was bothered however, when the transformation was completed and five of them started to howl.  
But by then it was too late.

About a week later, he was lying, half propped-up in a bed in St. Mungo’s Hospital. Victoire was sitting in chair next to his bed, fumbling nervously with the handle of her bag.  
This was so awkward.  
“What on earth happened?” Victoire asked. Her eyes were flickering between the bandages on Teddy’s body and the egg-shell-coloured walls, determinedly avoiding looking directly into Teddy’s eyes.  
Teddy watched Victoire’s nails scratching the sun-shine yellow fabric of her bag. “Five of them didn’t take the Wolfsbane like they should have,” muttered dully.  
“I thought you checked them. I thought you kept lists.”  
“I do. I check their names when I hand them the potion, but I don’t check whether they actually drain their flasks and swallow it. I’m not from the MLE and they’re not criminals. You know that.”  
She nodded. “I do. I’m sorry. I’m not here to blame you.”  
“They planned this. I mean, it’s a great idea. Kill the one person werewolves on Wolfsbane trust the most, son of Remus Lupin, head of the Werewolf Support Service. The public mistrusts werewolves again and werewolves can’t feel safe going to the Ministry for help anymore, all in one stroke. Harry says the Aurors lost track of the underground werewolves a few hours later. I don’t think that was a coincidence.”  
“You think they meant for you to die?” Victoire asked, finally looking at him.  
“Yes. If they’d only wanted to transform me, they’d have sent one of them. Not five. I only survived because the ones on Wolfsbane intervened. A few of them had to spend a couple of nights here, too.”  
Victoire nodded. “Yes, Noah only came back to work yesterday. We hardly had time to talk though. It’s been pure chaos.”  
“Gran told me you took over for me.”  
“Yes.”  
“Thank you.”  
“Of course, someone’s got to do it, right? They need support now more than ever.”  
He smiled. He loved her for it. For her dedication. She had been the one who had encouraged him to make the fight for werewolves his profession after Hogwarts, had helped him found the Remus Lupin Foundation for the Protection and Support of Werewolves and their Families, had taken it over after she had graduated herself two years later, while he reopened the Werewolf Support Service in the Ministry of Magic. And even now, after he had left her and broken her heart a year ago, she was still here. Because they both knew that this was about something bigger than themselves. It was about the people who needed their help, who relied on them, because they had no one else to go to.  
“So, how is your grandmother taking it?” Victoire asked.  
“Horribly. She hardly leaves, she’s weeping half the time, it’s driving me crazy.”  
“It is her worst nightmare come true,” Victoire said fairly.  
“No, her worst nightmare was prevented. I’m still alive, aren’t I? But this constant I-told-you-so-look she gives me isn’t making it better. Which reminds me: You don’t happen to have brought the Prophet? She’s refusing to let me read it. Saying it’ll upset me too much.”  
Victoire bit her lip, as though she wasn’t sure how to answer that.  
“Well, I do agree, it will upset you,” she said slowly, opening her purse. “But you’re an adult. If you want to read it –“  
She pulled out the newspaper and handed it over to Teddy, looking guilty. Teddy took it. It was from the day after his attack. The headline read “Lupin Attacked by Werewolves” und beneath that “Head of the Werewolf Support Service nearly dies after being bitten by his clients.” He scanned through the article.  
“What the hell?” he asked, when he’d finished. “They don’t even mention the ones that saved my life.  
“I know,” Victoire sighed.  
“They risked their lives to save me and they don’t even get mentioned? It sounds as if I was attacked by every werewolf present.”  
“I know, Teddy, I’m sorry. You know what the Prophet is like. Dominique already put in a complaint, because they didn’t even get a statement from us before publishing the article. It was completely unprofessional. But the damage is done. We’ve been getting Howlers all week. People saying we’re endangering society by helping werewolves and that sort of thing. A lot of the clients don’t want to be seen at the Support Service or the Foundation anymore.”  
The article’s writing became blurry before Teddy’s eyes. His throat felt tight.  
“This sets us back years,” he pressed out between gritted teeth, his fist clenching the paper tightly.  
“I know, Teddy. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have shown it to you. We’re taking care of it. You need to rest and heal. Let us worry about this. You just focus on getting back on your feet.”  
She made to take the newspaper from him, but Teddy was still gripping it tightly.  
“Please, Teddy. There’s nothing you can do right now. And I need to get back to the Ministry.”  
He nodded and let go. “Thanks for stopping by.”

Teddy loved his grandmother very much. But she could be so annoying. He knew that losing her husband, daughter and son-in-law within only a couple of weeks’ time had made her incredibly scared of losing him, too. The only one she had left now. But even so, he didn’t appreciate her fussing over him worse than when he’d been a toddler with dragon pox. The hospital routine bored him to death and he was in constant pain, which did nothing to lift his mood. He’d started using his Scottish accent again just to annoy her. He had acquired it during his years at Hogwarts, learning from Professor McGonagall and his Scottish classmates, after learning that his father had had one. His grandmother hadn’t liked his father very much, he knew, so she wasn’t too pleased when Teddy spoke like that. Just as she hadn’t approved of his choice of career.  
Noah came by to talk to Teddy, as he always did when St. Mungo’s reported a newly-bitten patient.  
“This is ridiculous,” Teddy protested. “I already know all about werewolves.”  
“I know,” Noah sighed. “But you are new to actually being one. And like everyone else, you are welcome to come to the support group as soon as you get out of here.”  
“I’m not going to the support group, Noah! All those people there know me as their counselor. And most of them were probably there when I got bitten.”  
“So?”  
“I’m not going.”  
“This is nothing to be ashamed of, Teddy.”  
Teddy bit his lip, remembering how often he had said those words to werewolves. This is nothing to be ashamed of. He had never doubted the truth of the statement. Until now. Now, he felt like a fool for having let this happen. For letting the people down that relied on him. For putting his grandmother and everybody else who cared about him through this and for proving everybody right who had doubted his efforts to integrate werewolves into society.  
The Healers said they were going to see him through his first full moon before releasing him. They started giving him the Wolfsbane Potion the week before – it tasted even worse than he had expected. Teddy started to get anxious. He had seen other werewolves through countless full moons, had sat with them, watched them transform, taken care of their sore bodies the next day. But Noah was right, he had no idea what it was like to live through the experience instead of just witnessing it.  
The Potters came by a few times. It was the summer holidays, so the kids were home. Albus, from what Teddy heard, was behaving very much like the moody teenager he was. Harry was very busy at work, because apparently, the werewolves weren’t the only ones behaving strange.  
The Head of the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures came by for, what turned out to be a request for Teddy to resign.  
“You know I can’t fire you,” he said, looking uncomfortable. “It’s illegal to fire someone for becoming a werewolf.”  
“I know,” Teddy said. He had helped craft that law.  
“But ironically enough, your job might be the only one in this country that you simply cannot do as a werewolf. You know we have two positions in the office. One for a werewolf and one for a human.”  
“A non-werewolf!” Teddy corrected sharply. “We’re still human.”  
“Right. I’m sorry. Anyway, the werewolf position is already taken. There might be an opening in the Committee for the Disposal of Dangerous Creatures soon, if you’re interested in staying in the department.”  
Teddy looked at him in disbelief. “I’m a counselor, not an executioner.”  
“I know that, but –“  
“Thank you, but I think I’ll rather look for something else. You’ll have my resignation on your desk by tomorrow.”  
“I’m really very sorry, Ted. You did excellent work in your office.”  
“Thanks.”

He was released a few days after his first full moon in early September. His grandmother begged him to stay at her place for a while, but he refused. Instead, he went back to the little flat he had left one night some five weeks ago, thinking he’d return the next day.  
His gran made dinner for him and then left. He was grateful. For both.  
He ate alone, then dragged himself to bed, exhausted and in pain.  
Dominique came by the next day.  
“You know the Foundation supports you financially during the first three months after the bite, right?”  
“Yes, I do,” he said, trying not to sound annoyed.  
“Do you have any idea what you’d like to do after you’ve recovered?” she asked, giving him a somewhat anxious look.  
“No. But don’t worry. I will not try to replace either you or Victoire.”  
“I didn’t say you would. I just thought, seeing as you can’t work at the Ministry anymore, you would want to come back to the Foundation.”  
He shook his head. “You and Victoire make an excellent team. I don’t want anyone else to run it. And I don’t want to push in or intervene. That would just get awkward. Anyway, I don’t think I’m in a place where I can help werewolves right now. I’m probably going to do something completely different for a while.”  
“That sounds like a good idea,” Dominique agreed.  
“Have they found someone to replace me, yet?” Teddy asked.  
“No. Victoire’s still filling in for you. What happened to you doesn’t really encourage people to apply.”

The weeks rushed past in blur. He spent most days in bed, sometimes getting up to eat something or go to the bathroom. His gran came by every few days to restock his kitchen and tidy up. She kept his alcohol away while he was still getting potions for the pain. She put the bottles back when he was off the potions and gave him a stern look that he ignored.  
The Potters didn’t visit. His gran told him something about Albus causing trouble at school, which didn’t really sound like Albus. But then again, he was fourteen years old, so it wasn’t that unlikely and Teddy couldn’t really be bothered with it.  
Noah asked him if he wanted to come to the Ministry for his second full moon. Teddy refused. Partly because he knew Victoire would be there and he didn’t want his ex-girlfriend to see him at his most vulnerable. He didn’t go to the support group either or to collect the Wolfsbane Potion. Instead, he sent his owl to collect it from the Ministry. He didn’t want to see any of his old clients. In fact, he didn’t want to see anyone.  
On the day before his third full moon, he heard that Albus was missing in time, but in his befuddled mind that information didn’t even make sense and he wasn’t able to get out of bed that day, anyway. Everyone said the first year was the worst. Hell, he’d used to say that to his clients. Now he prayed it was true, because surely, he couldn’t go on living the rest of his life like this.

Harry visited about a week later. He told Teddy the whole story of what had happened.  
“Do you think Delphi was behind the attack on me?” Teddy asked.  
“Probably,” Harry said. “Especially with where you two come from.”  
“You mean her mother killing mine?”  
“Yes. She might have wanted to finish the job.”  
“This family is so fucked up,” Teddy groaned.  
“I know. I’m sorry I haven’t been around lately, Teddy.”  
“No, it’s fine. Don’t apologize. You were busy taking care of your kid, saving the world, the usual.”  
“Right. But I want to make it up to you.”  
“You don’t have to -“  
“Please,” Harry interrupted him. “Listen. I might have found a job for you. We’re going to have a few changes in my department after what happened. And as you know, the current Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is one of my former Aurors, as they usually are. But I would like to bring him back to the Auror office, because we need experienced people right now. So, I spoke to Professor McGonagall and she said that I could ask you whether you might want to take over for him at Hogwarts.”  
“As Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher?” Teddy asked surprised.  
“Yes. You were excellent at Defense and McGonagall says it might be a good idea to bring in a teacher who is a trained counsellor after a student’s death. And I, personally, wouldn’t mind to have someone at Hogwarts to keep an eye on Albus.”  
Teddy laughed. “Ah. So, that’s where this is coming from.”  
“No, Teddy, I really do think you’d make a good teacher and so does Professor McGonagall.”  
“I know. It’s OK. I’ll think about it. Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I hope you like it and I'm always grateful for kudos and feedback!


	2. Getting Started

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Teddy starts his new job.

“I’m sending a Christmas card to the Bowkers,” Teddy’s grandmother said. “Do you want to sign, too?”  
“Who are the Bowkers?” Teddy asked.  
“Their son was killed by Delphini Riddle.”  
“Right. And why are we sending them a card?”  
“Because my niece murdered their son,” Andromeda said.  
Teddy looked up. “But that’s not our fault.”  
“I know,” she answered calmly, her voice a bit lower than usual. “Still.”  
“Sure, I’ll sign it.”  
“You know,” she said thoughtfully, looking up from the Christmas card she was writing and staring at the fireplace. “I truly hated my sister, even when we were kids. But lately I’ve found myself wishing I had strangled her in her sleep while we still lived under the same roof. It would have saved myself and the rest of the world a lot of pain.” She met his gaze. “And you.”

Teddy and his gran spent Christmas with the Potters and the Granger-Weasleys. It was good.  
His wounds were fully healed by now, so he wasn’t in pain any more. And there were so many people, and so much noise and laughter, that it kept all of Teddy’s slightly melancholy self-pity he’d grown accustomed to in the past months, at bay.  
He stayed at the Potters’ after Christmas for the full moon. It got quieter, as the Granger-Weasleys and his grandma left for their respective homes. Harry and Ginny went back to work, James had stayed at Hogwarts for the holidays, and Albus kept mostly to his room. Lily, on the other hand, followed Teddy everywhere. Ginny kept telling her not to, because she thought it would get onto Teddy’s nerves and said that he needed to rest. But he was glad for the distraction.

“Can I stay with you during the full moon, Teddy, please?” she asked him during breakfast on the morning of the dreaded day.  
“If your parents allow it,” Teddy said, trying to sound as if it made no difference to him, even though he was hoping very much Harry and Ginny would allow it. He had not faced a full moon alone yet. For the first he’d been in hospital, during the second Dominique had stayed with him, as she sometimes did for newly-bittens who didn’t want to go to the Ministry for the transformation and the other two his grandmother had come over for. It wasn’t the transformation he was afraid to go through alone, it was the fear of it. He knew it was absurd to be afraid of fear like this, and he hadn’t found the words yet to tell anyone what he was so scared of. He dreaded the hours before the transformation the most, because then the fear seemed to take over his mind. And in those hours, he felt sure that if he were alone, without someone’s presence there to remind him of who he was, he would lose his mind along with his human body during the night.  
“Lily, I’m sure Teddy will want some peace and quiet tonight,” Ginny said softly.  
“No, really,” Teddy interrupted hastily. He saw Harry looking at him with an expression as if he’d heard the plea in Teddy’s voice.  
“Oh, please, Mum,” Lily whined. “This is the closest I’ll ever get to having a pet dog.”  
“Lily!” Harry exclaimed, horrified. “We do not call people pets!”  
“I didn’t mean –“  
“I don’t care. You apologize to Teddy, right now!”  
Lily sighed. “Fine. Sorry, Teddy.”  
Teddy smiled. “It’s OK.”  
“Can I still stay with Teddy tonight?” Lily asked anxiously.  
“What do you mean ‘still’?” Ginny asked, half amused, half annoyed, “I said no.”  
“But Teddy said I could.”  
“Teddy said you could if we allowed it.”  
“So, allow it.”  
Harry and Ginny looked at each other for a few short moments, communicating without words.  
“Yes,” Harry finally said. “But remember he’s still Teddy. Not your pet.”  
“Of course.”

“Merlin, this job is exhausting,” Teddy groaned as he sat down next to Neville and began piling food onto his plate.  
“I know,” Neville sighed, “it’s a much-underappreciated profession.”  
“Your first-years are a bit direct,” Teddy said crossly.  
“I know. Sorry, I probably should have warned you. They tend to ask a lot of questions.”  
“They certainly do.”  
“I hope they didn’t ask anything inappropriate?” Neville asked tentatively.  
“Just a bit personal.”  
“Well, to be fair, they’ve never had a werewolf for a teacher before, so –“ his voice trailed off.  
“It shouldn’t be such an unusual thing to happen. Not nowadays.”  
“No argument from me on that. How were the rest of your classes?”  
“Well, I had the second-year Hufflepuffs -“  
Neville let out a small laugh. “Say no more.”  
“I mean they’re adorable, but – I don’t know how to phrase it.”  
“I think the diplomatic way to put it is that they confirm many of the Slytherin’s more prejudicial expectations of Hufflepuffs.”  
Teddy tried to keep a straight face. “I mean, they’re eager.”  
“Oh, yes. Absolutely,” Neville agreed. “Very eager.”

“So, hello,” Teddy said. He was still a little uncomfortable standing in front of a class. “Good afternoon. My name is Professor Lupin. And, first things first, are there really so few people in this class?”  
A dozen heads nodded.  
“Okay, well, I guess I have a bit of work to do, to make the subject a bit more popular. Or did your classmates all fail their O.W.L.s?”  
“No,” a Ravenclaw girl answered, “but most people don’t see the point in Defense Against the Dark Arts. They say there’s no practical use in the real world for it.”  
Teddy raised his eyebrows. “Well, I understand their point, but would tend to disagree. Anyway, I’m glad you are all here. Short information for the Hufflepuffs present: As you may have already heard, I am your new Head of House. I took over from Professor MacMillan because being the Muggle Studies professor, he doesn’t teach all the students. Neither do I, but at least everyone below sixth year. So, if you have any problems, issues or questions feel free to knock on my door. Also, if you fancy a cup of tea, chocolate or a nice talk. The offer also stands for students from other houses. That being said, let’s get into the defense. I heard you just started on the subject of Dementors, is that correct?”

When the lesson had finished, Fred Weasley approached Teddy’s desk while the other students trickled out.  
“Mr Weasley,” Teddy said, winking. “What can I do for you?”  
Fred grinned and shook his head. “Nothing. Just wanted to tell you that it was a good lesson.”  
“Why, thank you.”  
“So, what’s it like?” Fred asked. “Being back as at Hogwarts as a teacher?”  
“Bit weird,” Teddy admitted. “Especially calling the other teachers by their first names. I’m going to have to get used to that.”  
“And calling all of us by our last names?” Fred asked, grinning  
“Only sixth and seventh years. I call the kids by their first names. But you’re adults now.”  
“And having Weasleys in your classes?”  
“I only had you and Rose today, who was exactly how I would have expected. Smart, but – am I allowed to say this as a teacher? –“  
“Highly annoying? Yes, it’s not news to anyone. But does that mean you don’t have the fourth year Gryffindors and Slytherins together?”  
“It does.”  
“Good. Rose’s friends can be quite mean to Albus and the Malfoy-kid. It got a bit better after Halloween, but still. I’m trying to keep an eye on it.”  
Teddy’s eyes fell on the Head Boy badge on Fred’s chest. “Right,” he said, “that sounds like a good idea.”

As he had the last period free, he retreated to the staff room to go over his lessons for the next day again. Only two other teachers were there. Professor Binns was sitting in an armchair in front of the fire, staring blankly at the wall and a blond witch, not much older than Teddy, was sitting at one of the tables, marking essays. Teddy sat down beside her.  
“Hello,” he said in a low voice, “I don’t think we’ve met yet. Ted Lupin, new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.”  
She looked up, not returning his polite smile. “Cate Cresswell,” she said curtly. “Potions.”  
“You’re Head of Slytherin, right?”  
She nodded, her attention already turned back to the essays in front of her.  
“Any relation to Dirk Cresswell?”  
“He was my father,” she said, underlining a misspelled word in red ink.  
“He and my grandfather were on the run together in ’98.”  
“Yes, and then got killed,” she said, sounding distracted. “Look, I’d love to share family stories, but I really need to get on with this.”  
“Sorry,” Teddy said. “I’ll leave you to it.”

Lily, too, came to Teddy’s desk after class the next day, accompanied by her friend Gracie, whom Teddy already knew from his previous job.  
“Hello, Gracie, how was your holiday?” he asked.  
“It was great. And it’s so cool that you’re a teacher now. Finally, I’m not the only werewolf at Hogwarts anymore!”  
Teddy smiled. There was in fact another werewolf in Slytherin, a fifth-year. But Gracie didn’t know about that and Teddy wasn’t allowed to tell her, because the student in question – and particularly her parents – didn’t want her fellow students to know about her condition.  
Gracie was different. Not many werewolf-children even attended Hogwarts. Gracie had been bitten at a very young age, so she didn’t remember a time when she had not been werewolf. Teddy supposed that helped. And the fact that she came from a very supportive family. Before she’d started at Hogwarts she’d often come to the Ministry for the full-moon and she had been one of Teddy’s favourite clients.  
“Teddy, do you have chocolate?” Lily asked, sitting down on his desk.  
Teddy tried to look stern at her use of his first name. But really, it was okay, the lesson was over, after all.  
“Of course, I have chocolate. What sort of question is that?” He pulled a bar of chocolate from his pocket, unwrapped it and broke it into three pieces. Lily and Gracie both took one.  
“How’s your day, Teddy?” Lily asked, through her mouth full of chocolate.  
“Turns out Tuesday is Potter-day for me,” Teddy said. “I had Albus’s class before lunch and the sixth-years are next.”  
“Are you talking about us?” The three of them turned around. James had entered the classroom.  
“Hey James. Chocolate?” Teddy asked, offering a piece of his own.  
“Always,” James grinned, taking it. “Anyway, how cool is this? You’re my teacher now!”  
“Yes. Why weren’t you home over Christmas?” Teddy asked. “Your parents missed you.”  
“Oh, my parents did?” James asked, winking at Teddy.  
Lily rolled her eyes. “Come on, we need to get to Charms,” she said, dragging Gracie behind her out of the room.  
“Bye, Teddy!” Gracie called.  
Teddy ignored James’s comment.  
“Louis asked me to stay. His parents were fighting over who was going to spend Christmas with the children, so he decided neither of them. And to be honest, I didn’t need to see Dad’s embarrassing attempts at showing fatherly affection towards Albus.”  
“That’s a bit harsh, isn’t it?”  
“Not exactly. He almost destroyed the world and what are the consequences? Special treatment from our parents and my mum telling me I should take better care of him. What am I, his babysitter?”  
“I think Albus was very lonely. Shouldn’t that concern us all?”  
“Maybe if he didn’t spend so much time feeling sorry for himself, he would actually have some friends.”  
Teddy sighed. The classroom started to fill, so he didn’t argue any further.  
“So, what are we doing today?” James asked with a cocky smile.  
“You’ll see.”  
The bell rang and everybody took their seats. The one next to James remained empty Teddy noticed.  
“Good afternoon, everyone. My name is Professor Lupin and I’m your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.” He held his usual speech about being new Head of Hufflepuff and then went on by going through the list of names to check everyone was present. He was just about to start reading them out, when the door opened and Louis Weasley entered. He closed the door behind himself and walked over to the empty seat next to James.  
“Mr Weasley, you’re late,” Teddy said.  
Louis looked at him, his eyebrows raised. “Yes, I know, thank you,” he answered annoyed and sat down.  
Well, that was an interesting start. Teddy considered for a moment whether to take points for Louis’s lateness, but chose not to.

This time it was a Slytherin girl, who stayed behind after class.  
“Miss – I’m sorry, I don’t know all the names yet.”  
“Bowker.”  
“Yes. Miss Bowker, what can I do for you?” Teddy asked.  
“I just wanted to thank you for the card you and Mrs Tonks sent my parents for Christmas. It was very kind.”  
“You’re Craig Bowker’s sister?”  
“Yes.”  
“How are you doing?”  
“I, uh –“ She bit her lip.  
“I’m sorry. It’s probably not the place for so complicated a question. If you’d like, you can come by my office sometime. We can talk.”  
She gave a non-comital shrug. “Maybe.”

“Professor Cresswell?”  
“Cate, please.”  
“Right, Cate, sorry.”  
He’d caught her coming out of her classroom in the dungeons. She was levitating about twenty scrolls of parchment in front of her while hurrying along towards the stairs, Teddy on her heals.  
“What is it?”  
“I was just wondering if you could tell me what it’s been like for your students the past few months? You know, with one of their classmates dying.”  
She didn’t slow down. “What do you mean? I have about two-hundred students in my house. Everyone reacts in their own way to something like that. What do you want me to tell you?”  
“What about his sister? She’s a sixth-year –“  
“I don’t know. She didn’t choose Potions for her N.E.W.T.s, so I don’t see her in classes anymore.”  
“Yes, but you’re still her Head of House –“  
“And if another teacher tells me there is a problem with her, I take care of it. No one has.”  
“And the fact that her brother just died, does not warrant any concern on your part?” Teddy asked, trying to keep the anger out of his voice.  
“She’s almost of-age and I’m her teacher, Ted, not her mother.”  
“I see.”


	3. Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neville is worried about Scorpius Malfoy, and seems to think Teddy can help. Louis gets caught with a dung bomb.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yes, that took a while. Hopefully the next one will not take that long.  
> Thank you for waiting and I hope you enjoy it.

“Teddy, hold on a second!” Neville called.  
Teddy, who was just on his way to the Great Hall for lunch, stopped and waited until Neville had caught up with him.  
“What’s up?” he asked.  
“You had the Slytherin fourth-years yesterday, didn’t you?” Neville asked as they continued their way downstairs together.  
“Yes, I did. Why?”  
“Did you notice anything unusual about Albus or Scorpius?”  
“I don’t think so. But I only met Scorpius Malfoy for the first time yesterday, so I don’t know yet what would qualify as unusual. Why do you ask?”  
“Scorpius was missing from class today and that’s not like him at all. When I asked Albus why, he looked very uncomfortable, and refused to give a satisfying answer. But he did say that maybe it would be a good idea if you tried to talk to Scorpius.”  
“Why would he say that?” Teddy asked confused. “Like I said, I don’t even know the kid.”  
“Beats me,” Neville shrugged. “But it might be worth a try.”  
“Okay. Where is he?”  
“I just checked the hospital wing. He’s not there, so I guess he’s probably in his dormitory.”  
“And how would I get in there?”  
Neville shrugged. “Ask Cate.”

“Professor Lupin? You wanted to see me?”  
It was Albus.  
“You can call me Teddy, Albus. We’re not in class.”  
“Right. Neville’s a lot stricter with that.”  
“I see. Well, yes, I wanted to see you. What’s going on with Scorpius?”  
“Why?” Albus asked warily.  
“Neville told me he missed classes today and that I should go talk to him.”  
“And did you?”  
“No. Professor Cresswell told me – and I quote –: “No way is a Hufflepuff entering my house.”  
The corner of Albus’s mouth twitched. “Yes, that sounds like her.”  
“So, can you tell me what’s going on?”  
“No. But I could give you the password,” Albus offered.  
“I don’t know. She doesn’t seem like the type to cross.”  
“Teddy, you do know you’re a teacher now, right? She can’t give you detention.”  
“Thank you, Mr Potter,” Teddy said sarcastically. “Why do you want me to talk to him anyway?”  
Albus looked at his feet. “I don’t know,” he murmured. “I just thought it might be good.”  
“Well, tell him my door is always open. That goes for you, too.”  
Albus nodded.

On Thursday Teddy decided that the fifth-year Gryffindor and Slytherin class would be his favourite. He was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to have a favourite class. But they were great. Not that they were low-maintenance – on the contrary –, but they were eager for the subject, they were curious, they asked good questions – and they were the highest year that hadn’t known Teddy as a student, as the sixth and seventh years had, so they respected him.  
Or at least, most of them did.  
“Roxanne Weasley, please tell me you’re not playing hangman with your neighbour while I am teaching.”  
Roxanne looked up at him, a cheeky grin spreading across her face.  
“I’m not playing hangman with my neighbour while you are teaching, Professor Lupin.”  
“Then what is that I see on the bottom of your parchment?” Teddy asked.  
“Hangman.”  
“So, why did you lie to me?”  
“Because you asked me to,” Roxanne answered in a falsely-innocent tone. “You said to tell you that –“  
“Yes, I get it. Very funny. Well, if you’re so eager to follow my instructions, how’s this: Don’t play hangman in my class.”  
Roxanne let out a dramatic sigh and nodded. The class laughed. Teddy joined in.

Teddy spent Saturday morning marking essays. After lunch, he decided to take a stroll outside. The snow still lay thick around Hogwarts. He had to tell Lucy and a few of her third-year friends off for bewitching a snowman the first-years had built to chase their creators around the castle.  
As he went on, he saw Louis standing before one of the castle’s walls, his wand out, seemingly levitating something that looked suspiciously like a dung bomb towards one of the windows. Upon closer examination, Teddy realised that the target was his own bedroom. He approached Louis undercover of the first-years’ screaming. When he’d reached him, he slung an arm around Louis’s shoulder and said:  
“You know, this is something that’s really only funny if you don’t get caught doing it.”  
Louis jumped. The dung bomb he’d been levitating came soring into the snow. Louis took a step back from Teddy, his expression somewhere between angry and flustered.  
“Isn’t this a bit petty?” Teddy asked. “Even for you?”  
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Louis snapped. “Even for me?”  
“I don’t see why you get to be angry at me,” Teddy said, ignoring the question.  
“Oh, you don’t?” Louis scoffed.  
“No. It’s been over a year. Your sister is over it, so I don’t see why you insist on holding a grudge. If she wanted to hate me for the rest of her life, I’d understand that. Not you. You’re not the one I broke up with.”  
“Yes, keep telling yourself that she’s over it. Doesn’t make it true.”  
“Come one, Louis –“ Teddy sighed.  
“What?”  
“I thought you of all people would understand.”  
Louis raised his eyebrows, his arms crossed before his chest. “Me of all people? And why is that?”  
“Because you’re gay, too.”  
“Exactly!” Louis said, raising his voice and leaning in a little. “Which is why I don’t date girls. It’s very simple, Teddy.”  
“Oh, come on –“  
But Louis had already turned around and was stalking off.  
Teddy shook his head. He looked from the abandoned dung bomb in the snow to his bedroom window. He’d have to put some protective charms on it.

He was on his way back to his office when he passed someone sitting on one of the window sills, watching the first and third years throwing snowballs at each other. It was Scorpius Malfoy.  
Teddy stopped. He had not tried to talk to Scorpius again, since the week had kept him far too busy and he’d seen Scorpius at breakfast the day after his talk with Albus, so he’d thought that it couldn’t have been anything too bad.  
“Scorpius?” he said kindly.  
Scorpius looked up. “Professor Teddy,” he stuttered, “I mean – Mr Lupin. I mean –“  
Teddy smiled.  
Scorpius blushed. “Sorry,” he squeaked.  
“Don’t worry. I’m not fussed about titles. What are you doing here all by yourself?”  
“Nothing,” Scorpius said hastily.  
“Well then, can I offer you a cup of tea in my office?” Teddy asked.  
Scorpius looked at him apprehensively.  
Teddy decided not to wait for an answer. “Come on,” he said, setting off again and waving for Scorpius to follow him.  
When they reached his office, he held open the door for Scorpius  
“Have a seat,” he said, gesturing towards a chair in front of his desk. “Sorry for the mess. I was just marking essays.  
He waved his wand at the essays scattered across the desk, and they sorted themselves into neat piles. Then he pointed it at the kettle, which began to heat water. He then sat down behind his desk and gave Scorpius, who looked a bit intimidated, an encouraging smile.  
“How are you?” he asked, leaning forward, his hands folded on the desk.  
Scorpius gave a weak and unconvincing smile. “Fine,” he said. He looked uncomfortable.  
“Are you sure?” Teddy asked. “I heard you missed classes on Wednesday.”  
Scorpius nodded. “I was a bit under the weather. I’m sorry.”  
“No. You’re not being told off,” Teddy assured him quickly. “And you can tell me it’s none of my business, if you want me to stop asking questions. I’m not trying to be nosy or anything. It’s just that Albus told me it might be a good idea if I talked to you.”  
Scorpius bit his lower lip.  
“And I was a bit surprised by that,” Teddy continued. “Because we don’t know each other. Yet. And don’t get me wrong. You are very welcome to come talk to me whenever you want. But I was wondering why Albus would say that it should be me and not, say, your own Head of House.”  
“Professor Cresswell is not one to talk to outside of class,” Scorpius blurted out.  
“Fair point. Well, I think Professor Longbottom offered. Why me? I mean, we’re related, but –“ He left the sentence unfinished.  
“It’s got nothing to do with that,” Scorpius said.  
“But you know why Albus asked me?”  
Scorpius nodded.  
“And will you tell me?”  
Scorpius sighed. “Albus told me last year that you broke up with your girlfriend.”  
“Yes,” Teddy said slowly, not sure where this was going.  
“I was surprised, you know. She was Head Girl in my first year. And she was very nice. She once told some third-years off for calling me ‘Son of Voldemort’, and she’s very pretty. And I’d seen a picture of you two once in the Prophet. I think it was during the Quidditch World Cup. I saw a picture of Albus and his family there too. I wanted to go to the final, but my mum wasn’t feeling too well, and my dad didn’t like going to crowded places with us, because he’d get angry stares or mean comments and he didn’t want me to know that. But I remember the Potters were all in red for Bulgaria and only Albus was in green for Brazil, which in retrospect really should have been a clue to his parents about his house. But I think he only did it to antagonize his dad. He does that a lot, and I don’t know why, he –“  
“Scorpius,” Teddy interrupted him, not sure how to ask him to get to the point in the kindest possible way and also trying not to smile, because he didn’t want Scorpius to think he found his rambling amusing.  
“Your gay!” Scorpius blurted out and immediately clapped his hands over his mouth, his face going tomato-red.  
“Yes. What?” Teddy asked confused, thinking quickly. “Okay, Albus told you I broke up with Victoire because I’m gay.”  
Scorpius nodded, his hands still firm over his mouth.  
“And Albus thought I should talk to you, because I’m gay and you know that and so it might be easier for you to talk to me than to someone else?”  
Scorpius nodded again.  
“Because you’re gay, too?”  
Scorpius let his hands sink and nodded a third time. He looked a bit deflated.  
Behind Teddy, the kettle was pouring boiling water into two cups, which came floating onto the desk.  
“And you told Albus?”  
Scorpius nodded. He leaned forward and made his teabag hop up and down in the hot water.  
“What happened? Did he say something that hurt you?”  
“No,” Scorpius said quickly, eyes still focussed on his tea. “Not really.”  
“Then what?”  
Scorpius took a few shaky breaths. Teddy had the feeling that he was close to tears.  
“I thought he would, too,” he said, his voice higher than before.  
“What?” Teddy asked. But Scorpius didn’t seem able to get any more words out. “You thought he would come out, too?” Teddy guessed.  
Scorpius nodded, bowing his head.  
“Because you’re in love with him?”  
Scorpius sniffed.  
“But he didn’t,” Teddy said.  
Scorpius shook his head.  
Teddy sighed, and leaned back in his chair. He waved his wand and conjured a box of tissues in front of Scorpius. He wasn’t sure what to say. The only thing he could think of was “Well, that sucks,” but he didn’t think that would be very helpful. Also, Scorpius probably already knew that.  
He gave the kid some time to collect himself, poured some milk and far too much sugar into his tea – his gran always said he’d inherited his mother’s sweet tooth – and waited.  
When he was done, Scorpius took his own cup, leaned back and took a sip.  
“Sorry,” he sniffed.  
“Don’t apologize,” Teddy said. “So, is this why I haven’t seen you and Albus as much together as I expected to after his dad told me you two were inseparable?”  
Scorpius nodded.  
“Do you want to talk about it?”  
Scorpius shook his head hesitantly. “Too embarrassing,” he mumbled.  
“No, it’s not.”  
“Yes, it is. I told him and he – and I’m so stupid. I destroyed everything. I just, I thought – and I was wrong. That happens a lot. Like last year. We thought we had a good idea and it turned out to be really stupid. And we almost destroyed the world. And we got a classmate killed. And in potions I always manage to blow things up. Why does that always happen to me? Like, every time I do something it just goes horribly wrong, and now I destroyed everything. And Albus was my best friend, my only friend, and I ruined it.”  
“Why?” Teddy asked. “Don’t you want to be his friend anymore?”  
“I do, but –“  
“You think he doesn’t?”  
“Well, yes.”  
“Why?”  
“Because. He’ll think I –,“ Scorpius broke off again.  
“What?” Teddy pressed on.  
“He’ll think it’s disgusting.”  
Teddy raised his eyebrows.  
Scorpius put his cup of tea back on the table. His hands were shaking.  
“I don’t think so,” Teddy said softly. “To be honest, I think you’re being a bit unfair.”  
Scorpius almost flinched a little.  
“I’ve known Albus for a long time. And I’ve never seen him do anything that would warrant such an expectation. I understand that you’re embarrassed. I don’t think you have to be, but it’s a common way to react to a love confession that doesn’t get the expected reply. But you shouldn’t deny Albus the chance to do the right thing. You can’t be blamed for how you feel. You were honest, you told him the truth. That took a great deal of courage, and I’m sure Albus appreciates that. He did seem worried about you when he talked to me. Not like someone who is disgusted.”  
Scorpius bit his lip again. Teddy let him think about it all in silence. He opened a drawer under his desk and took out a bar of chocolate, which he pushed over the desk to Scorpius. The boy took it absent-mindedly, unwrapped it and began to eat.  
It helped, he seemed to relax a little. When he’d finished the bar, he looked back up at Teddy.  
“Thanks,” he murmured.  
“Any time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Please, leave kudos and comments if you liked it!


	4. Full Moon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Teddy's first full moon at Hogwarts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it took me three weeks to write the last chapter, and one night for this one. I don't get it either. But I hope you like it.

“Teddy, are we starting Patronuses next week?” James asked.  
“No. I told you, I won’t teach you Patronuses until next year, and certainly not before all of you have mastered the Shield Charm.”  
James rolled his eyes. “I have.”  
“Good for you. You can help the others,” Teddy suggested without any real hope.  
James scoffed.  
“Teddy, will you come to our Gobstones Competition tomorrow?” Lily asked.  
“I don’t know, yet. I have a ton of essays to mark.” Teddy looked up. The three Potter-children were sitting on the rug in front of his office’s fireplace, the floor around them littered with chocolate wrappers. “Lily, why do you even play Gobstones?”  
“To annoy Mum,” Albus explained.  
“With great success,” James added.  
“But you have to come, Teddy!” Lily whined. “Hugo will be playing, too.”  
“You three do know that I have an actual job, that includes working?” Teddy asked, slightly annoyed.  
“Do it some other time,” James said.  
“When? There always seems to be a Potter in my office keeping me from getting anything done! What are you doing here all the time? Don’t you have friends?”  
The three looked at each other.  
“Scorpius is studying,” Albus said.  
“Why aren’t you?” Teddy asked confused.  
“Because it’s not homework. He’s voluntarily doing extra research for History of Magic. Who does that?”  
Teddy tried not to smile. Because he had a headache. And he really needed these essays done.  
“Louis has a new boyfriend,” James supplied. “He’s very annoying.”  
“Don’t you have a girlfriend?” Albus asked.  
“Yes. Almost equally annoying.”  
“I don’t understand you,” Albus said.  
“That’s mutual.”  
“What’s your excuse, Lily?” Teddy asked.  
“Oh, the full moon is coming up, and Gracie wanted to be left alone. She’s got a headache.”  
Teddy looked up. The look he gave the Potters made them freeze.  
“Out!” he said in a low voice. “All of you, out now!”  
“Come on, Teddy, that was a joke,” Lily said quickly.  
“Do I look amused?” Teddy asked.  
“Come on, let’s go,” Albus said quietly.  
“I guess it’s someone’s time of the month,” James murmured.  
Lily shook her head. “That joke is so old, James.”

Tuesday was horrible. It was the last day before his three-day-long full-moon-break. His last class were the sixth years. He had them practice Shield Charms in pairs, because he didn’t feel up to lecturing them on a knew topic. He sat down on a chair in front of the blackboard to watch them, because his legs had started to shake from exhaustion when standing. The students seemed to realize that he wasn’t well. Even Louis refrained from acting up.  
Before the bell rang he assigned them their homework. “I won’t be here on Friday. Professor Longbottom is going to fill in. But he knows about the essay, so you still have to turn it in. Okay, off you go. Miss Weasley, could I have a word?”  
Molly came to the front, looking surprised.  
“I wanted to know, if you would do me a huge favour and take over some classes during the full moon?”  
She blinked. “You mean, as in teach?” she asked.  
“Yes. Slytherin and Hufflepuff first-years on Thursday, first period, and Slytherin and Ravenclaw second-years on Friday last period.”  
“Why?”  
“Well, Professor Longbottom has agreed to take the sixth and seventh years, Professor MacMillan will teach third to fifth year, and you and Fred Weasley would take the little ones. You’re good at Denfense, you’re smart, mature, responsible. I trust you and I think you’re up to it. You’d be doing me a huge favour and earn twenty points for Hufflepuff per lesson.”  
“Sure,” Molly said. She seemed to have grown about an inch while he spoke. “What do you want me to do with them?”  
“I wrote it all down,” he said, handing her a piece of parchment. “If you have any trouble, go to Professors MacMillan or Longbottom.”  
“I will,” Molly said, smiling, “thank you. And good – full moon?” she finished feebly.  
“Hardly. But thank you.”

“James, why are you here?” Teddy asked.  
“Is that how you greet a concerned friend who comes to check in if everything is all right?” James asked affronted.  
“Okay, here’s the deal, James. I’m a werewolf, and the full moon is tomorrow. Do you see what is not all right here?”  
“Hey, no reason to bark at me. Can I still say ‘bark’ or is that racist?”  
“Being a werewolf is not a race,” Teddy said, tired.  
“Then what is the term for discrimination against werewolves?”  
“Creaturism. Didn’t you know that?”  
“You’re kidding,” James laughed. “There really is an actual word for that?”  
“Yes, haven’t I taught you anything?”  
“Apparently not. Come on, you just made that up.”  
“No,” Teddy argued indignantly, “the Goblins have been using it for ages.”  
“So, is it?”  
“What?”  
“Creaturist?”  
“What?”  
“To say ‘bark’.”  
“No. ‘Howl’ might be.”  
“You’re kidding.”  
“And ‘it’s that time of the month’ most certainly is.”  
James ignored that. “So, here’s my question: The full moon is not until tomorrow night and you’re spending the day in bed, looking absolutely horrible –“ “Thanks.” “And rudely sending your best mate away.” “You’re so not my best mate.” “Meanwhile, Gracie is still attending classes today, and she’s like twelve and a girl.”  
“Hey, no sexism here either.”  
James sighed. “The world is so boring without a bit of discrimination.”  
“Don’t talk about things you don’t understand.”  
“So, why?”  
“What?”  
“Why are you suffering so dramatically.”  
“Because I’m still in my first year.”  
“That makes a difference?” James asked surprised.  
“Have you ever listened to anything I told your family about my old job at – you know – Christmas, Sunday dinners, and so on?” Teddy asked affronted.  
“Of course, Teddy. I like nothing more than you telling me about oppressed creatures,” Teddy cooed.  
Teddy rolled his eyes. “And speaking of sexism,” he said.  
“We were speaking of sexism?” James asked.  
“Is it my imagination or have you already gone through two girlfriends since I started here?”  
“Possible,” James shrugged. “I’ve stopped counting.”  
“But at the same time, you constantly keep flirting with me.”  
“What?” James said. “I would never do that! That would be totally inappropriate. You’re my teacher!”  
“Exactly,” Teddy agreed. “So, is this why you came here? To seduce me? Because I’ve got to tell you, an approaching full moon is a real turn-off.”  
“Are you implying that I might have a chance at another time?” James asked, grinning.  
“So not,” Teddy answered dryly.  
“No, that’s not why I came.”  
“Then why, James?”  
“Why did you ask Molly to teach the little ones and not me? I’m better at Defence than she is,” James said sulkily.  
“You really think, that’s what teaching first and second years is about, James? How well you can cast a Shield Charm? I asked Molly because she’s more mature than you are. I’m not sure I’d leave Flubberworms in your care, let alone children.”  
“You wound me, Teddy. When you say things like that, you really hurt my feelings,” James said, giving Teddy his puppy-look.  
“You know, that face was cute when you were six years old,” Teddy said.  
“Admit it, you still think I’m cute.”  
“Will that make you leave?”  
James thought about it for moment. “Yes.”  
“You’re very cute, James.”  
“Aw.”  
“Now, get out!”

He managed to drag himself down to the Great Hall for breakfast.  
“No offense, but you look awful,” Neville greeted him. “Why didn’t you stay in bed? I would have brought you something up.”  
Teddy shook his head. “It’s okay.”  
“Is there anything you need?” Neville asked.  
He looked at him. Neville seemed honestly concerned. Teddy thought about telling him about the tightening feeling he got in his chest every time he thought about the coming night, the way he couldn’t seem to breath at moments, when he realized that no one was going to be there to keep him from losing his mind. That it would be just him and his bedroom, and no one else.  
But he didn’t know how to say it. And he remembered that there were two students in this Hall that would go through the same thing tonight, one in the Hospital Wing, one in the Room of Requirement, without making a big deal about it. And he was not a student, he was not a child. It was not his place to be afraid and weak.  
“No, thank you,” he said, and poured himself some pumpkin juice.

He spent the day hoping someone, anyone would come by. Yesterday he’d just wanted to be left alone. Today, he’d have given anything not to have to be alone. But apart from an elf bringing him lunch, no one came. He started pacing his office at some time in the afternoon. He heard students chatter in the corridors after the bell had rang to signal the end of the last period. Someone knocked on the door. His heart skipped a beat.  
“Yes,” he said, realizing that his voice was trembling.  
Gracie stuck in her head and gave him a tired smile. “I’m on my way to the Hospital Wing,” she said. “Just wanted to wish you good luck.”  
“Thank you,” he said hoarsely.  
“Merlin, you look even worse than I feel.”  
He smiled weakly.  
“It gets better, you know,” she assured him.  
He nodded, seeking comfort in the words of twelve-year-old girl.  
“See you,” she said, and closed the door again.  
Teddy continued pacing the office. No one else would come. He’d told the elf he didn’t need dinner. He wouldn’t be hungry, and he wasn’t. This was it. Just him and this office.  
Parents, he thought. They would have been very useful now.  
He tried to hug himself.  
And then he realized it.  
His dad had been here. His dad had transformed here. During his year at Hogwarts, his dad had taken Wolfsbane Potion and transformed here in this office. And it had been the best year, because his dad didn’t have access to Wolfsbane outside of Hogwarts. And he had lost his mind every month and been afraid he might kill someone. Every month. For thirty years.  
Except for this one. This had been almost a luxury for his dad. This office had been his safe place. And here Teddy was, in a safe world, in the same place, not in danger of being exposed and shunned from society, with unlimited access to Wolfsbane and a safe place. And he felt like he was suffocating with fear. And he hated himself for his self-pity and this stupid, stupid fear, that didn’t even make sense, and for being so damn ungrateful, that he had it so much better. But it felt as though the walls of the office were closing in, and he couldn’t do this.  
He knew drinking on Wolfsbane wasn’t a very good idea. It wasn’t dangerous, the Potion still had its full effect, but it wasn’t advisable.  
He didn’t care. He needed this to stop.

“Teddy, what are you doing here? Isn’t it the full moon tonight? Shouldn’t you be in your room?”  
“Going to dinner,” Teddy mumbled.  
“Teddy, dinner is over. Has been for an hour. Are you all right?”  
He blinked. But the world insisted upon staying out of focus. “No.”  
“Are you sure, you should be out here in this state?”  
No, he was pretty sure he shouldn’t.  
“Come on, let me bring you back.” A hand gripped his arm firmly and guided him through the corridors.”  
The castle was falling silent.  
They reached his office quickly, it wasn’t a long way. She led him through to his bedroom. He sat down on the edge of the bed.  
“Are you on something?” she asked.  
“Wolfsbane,” he slurred.  
“Does that do this?” she asked suspiciously.  
“Only with alcohol.”  
“Interesting. But you won’t turn into a blood-thirsty monster any minute now because of that, will you?”  
He shook his head.  
“Well, that’s good to know. It’s past curfew, so I better get going.”  
“No,” he said quickly.  
“What, no?” she asked.  
“Please,” he whispered. “Please don’t go. Please don’t leave me alone.”  
His breathing fastened.  
“Okay,” she said quickly. “I’ll stay. Promise. It’s okay. I won’t leave. But if I get into trouble with Professor Longbottom, I’ll blame you.”  
He let out a shuddering breath and lay back on the bed. She sat down next to him, doing the same with an appropriate distance between them.  
He listened to his own breathing and hers next to him, calmer. Soothing.  
And after a while he began to transform, with Roxanne Weasley watching mildly interested.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. If you liked it, please leave kudos and comments.


	5. Listen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long! I hope there are still people left who want to read this. If you've stuck around: Thank you for your patience. I hope the next chapter won't take as long.
> 
> Also, I'm on tumblr now: prinzessinkiwi.tumblr.com  
> Feel free to visit, and message me if ever you want to talk about anything even remotely HP-related.

He woke up.  
Everything hurt.  
“Good morning, sunshine!”  
What the hell?  
He was lying on the floor of his office. He was cold and stiff, and pretty sure that a few of his bones were broken. He opened his eyes a tiny crack. The bright light hurt his eyes. Roxanne cowered down next to him.  
“I’m sure the bed would be more comfortable,” she said, reaching for his arm to help him get up.  
“Don’t!” Teddy yelped. “Don’t touch it. It’s broken.”  
“Oh, okay,” Roxanne said, pulling out her wand.  
“No offense, but I’d rather a professional did that,” Teddy groaned.  
Roxanne pursed her lips. “Please. My parents taught me basic Healing charms very early on. It’s a necessary skill to have in our household.”  
Teddy was too tired to argue with her. “Fine,” he sighed.  
She did indeed fix his arm effortlessly.  
“Anything else?” she asked.  
“Yes,” he mumbled. “But I’m not sure where.”  
She started prodding different parts of his body with her wand. Every time he winced, she repaired a broken bone, until he finally felt like he could move again. Roxanne helped him up. He stumbled through the door to his office and collapsed on the bed, exhausted. It was only then that he realized that Roxanne wasn’t the only one there.  
“Miss Bowker?” he asked. “What are you doing here?”  
“We brought you breakfast,” Roxanne answered firmly, gesturing towards Teddy’s bed-side table, where a tray had been put.  
Teddy blinked. “Thanks. Erm, I didn’t know you two were friends.”  
It seemed unlikely somehow.  
“Oh, we’re not friends,” Roxanne said quickly. “No, I would never befriend a Slytherin.”  
Bowker scoffed.  
Teddy didn’t get it. “Then why?”  
“We’re a couple,” Bowker explained.  
“I see. Is anyone in this family straight?” he wondered. Well, Albus, unfortunately. And Victoire.  
“Yes,” Roxanne answered dryly, “my perfect head-boy-with-ten-outstanding-O.W.L.s brother for example. He’s dating that head-girl from Ravenclaw.”  
“Don’t sound so bitter. Considering your parents, that makes him the black sheep.”  
Roxanne rolled her eyes. “And he relishes in that role. He’s like a boring version of you.”  
Teddy squinted. He tried to figure out whether that was a compliment or an insult, or neither. His mind was still not quite awake. “Well, let’s hope he doesn’t follow into my paw prints.”  
Bowker snorted.  
“Hey, who are you and where is the happy, good-natured Teddy I know and love?”, Roxanne asked and poked him.  
Teddy yelped. “Don’t do that. He’s on vacation. He’s going to be back in a few days. But I need to rest now. Thanks for everything.”

He spent most of the day in bed, catching up on sleep, and after that it was the weekend and he tried to catch up on marking essays.  
On Monday, he was already exhausted and the week was only just starting. Thankfully, he didn’t have a class the last period before dinner. He went back to his office, intending to get some rest, but instead found Scorpius Malfoy waiting there for him.  
“Hey Scorpius,” he said, smiling. “What brings you here?”  
“Nothing special,” Scorpius said, hovering anxiously behind Teddy while the latter opened his office door.  
“Well, come in,” Teddy said. “Tea? Chocolate?”  
Scorpius sat down in the chair across from his desk again and nodded. “Yes, please.”  
Teddy’s kettle went to work at a wave of his wand. He gestured at a bowl on his desk containing a variety of chocolate-based sweets, indicating for Scorpius to help himself.  
“How are you?” Teddy asked.  
“I’m fine,” Scorpius answered, far too quickly. He fumbled with the wrapper of his chocolate, looking around the room, apparently unsure what to say.  
Teddy leaned back in his seat and waited patiently.  
Scorpius’s look fell onto the photograph Teddy kept on his desk of his parents and himself, when he’d been only a few days old. His hair was turquoise in the picture, as was his mother’s  
“That’s sweet,” Scorpius gushed. “Your parents were heroes! I read all about them in the books about the war,” he told Teddy.  
“Yes,” Teddy said. “So did I.”  
Scorpius’s face fell a little. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t think.”  
“No,” Teddy said quickly. “It’s fine. Really. I’m proud to be their son.”  
Scorpius smiled sadly. “That must be nice.”  
Teddy swallowed. “Now I feel like I’m the one being insensitive.”  
“No,” Scorpius said. “Don’t. You’re not.”  
“Is that why you’re here?” Teddy asked. “Parents?”  
“No,” Scorpius said. “Not yet, anyway. I don’t go home until July, so I’ve got loads of time to think about how I’m going to tell my dad.”  
“Okay, then,” Teddy said. “How are things with Albus?”  
“Better,” Scorpius said. “He’s been very nice to me.”  
“Yes. I talked to him. He was worried about you.”  
“He’s been great. It’s just –“ Scorpius didn’t finish the sentence.  
“It’s still a broken heart?” Teddy suggested.  
Scorpius nodded.  
Teddy sighed. “It sucks,” he said, because he couldn’t think of anything else. “But it does get better.”  
Scorpius looked at him with big eyes. “I hope so! I can’t spend my whole life like this; it’s exhausting.”  
Teddy had to restrain himself not to laugh out loud affectionately, because Scorpius’s expression was just so adorable. “You won’t,” he assured Scorpius.

Friday night found Teddy sitting behind his desk with a glass of Fire-Whiskey in one and a bar of Honeyduke’s finest chocolate in the other hand, utterly exhausted, wondering if maybe accepting this job had been the wrong decision after all. It wasn’t that he didn’t like teaching. He liked it very much. The gleaming looks in his seventh-years’ eyes this week, after the first of them had finally managed to cast a Patronus, had been enough to reassure him of that. But it was a very demanding job. He could almost hear himself telling his former clients to take it slow, not to expect themselves to be able to do everything as before, because the transformations took a lot of strength and energy. Counsellor-Teddy knew all of it. Werewolf-Teddy didn’t want to hear about that. He took a sip of whisky and closed his eyes. He’d had the sixth-years earlier that day. While teaching them about the Shield Charm, he had suddenly had the urge to say something really impressive. He knew that feeling, knew it very well. Sometimes he and Victoire had played a game where she turned on her Veela Charm and he tried to resist for as long as he could. He’d become quite good at it. Today in class however, even the few seconds during which Louis had dared to play this trick had left Teddy shaking from the effort of keeping his mouth shut. He told himself that it was because he was out of practice, or because his new condition was still taking up much of his energy, and not because he was more turned on by his former girlfriend’s little brother than he had been by her. In his mind he could still see Louis’s half-accusing, half-satisfied glare, the smirk telling Teddy “You deserve this.”  
Teddy thought he might never have realized how lonely Hogwarts could be. Between trying to keep a professional distance, Cate Cresswell being quite an unsocial person, and the rest of the staff being much older than him and a bit intimidating (with the possible exception of Neville), Teddy was starting to miss friend-like company. He was used to work at the Ministry, where he had run into people he knew – mostly Potters or Weasleys - all day, and had shared an office with a good friend. He hadn’t written to Noah in a while for fear of being lectured on how to be a werewolf.

He overslept on Saturday. When he made it down to the Great Hall for breakfast, the only unoccupied seat at the staff table was the one next to Cate Cresswell. Great.  
He sat down beside her and started piling food onto his plate.  
“Hungry?” Cate asked.  
“Yes,” Teddy said. “I’m starving.”  
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you,” Cate said, turning around to face him.  
Uh-oh. This couldn’t be good.  
The thought must have shown on his face, because she gave a small annoyed frown. He thought she might have been amused.  
“You know I’m one of the Wolfsbane suppliers for the Ministry?” she asked him.  
“No, I didn’t,” he said. “I knew your predecessor was, though. I guess it makes sense.”  
“Right, well, I was travelling a lot before I took the post here, and when I started, you’d already left the Ministry, so you wouldn’t know. Anyway, I realized it’s sort of stupid that I send my batch to London every month and then they send it to you and the two cubs.”  
Teddy raised an eyebrow.  
“What? They are cubs,” Cate said defensively.  
“They’re children,” Teddy corrected her.  
She rolled her eyes. “Anyway, I talked to the Ministry and they agreed, so I’m going to give you your doses directly from now on. Is that OK?”  
“Yes, it’s fine,” Teddy said.  
He looked around the Great Hall. Everyone was very excited, as there would be a Quidditch match today; Gryffindor versus Ravenclaw. Teddy knew he should care, but really, he didn’t. He just hoped he wouldn’t have to intervene any fights or duels.  
“Hey, can I ask you something?” he said to Cate while the students started pouring out of the Great Hall.  
“Obviously,” she answered dryly.  
“Have you ever witnessed Louis Weasley turning on his Veela Charm to embarrass someone?”  
She frowned. “I didn’t know he had Veela ancestry.”  
He nodded.  
“Makes sense though. But not that I recall.”  
Most of the students had already gone when they left the Great Hall after breakfast.  
“Are you going to the match?” Cate asked.  
“Do I have a choice?” Teddy asked. “We all have to make sure they behave, don’t we? Not that my Hufflepuffs are known for causing trouble,” he added quietly.  
Cate raised her eyebrows. “Are you insinuating something?” Before Teddy could answer, she barked “Bowker!”  
He turned around. Bowker, who was half way down the staircase that led to the dungeons, had frozen and turned around.  
“Where are you going?” Cate asked sharply, moving towards her. Teddy followed hesitantly.  
“To the common room,” Bowker answered unconcerned.  
“Isn’t Roxanne playing today?” Teddy asked her. “Don’t you want to watch that?”  
“Yes, she is, and no, I don’t,” she replied.  
“Why not?” Cate asked, her voice losing a little of its sharp edge.  
Bowker straightened up a little, her eyes locking with Cate’s. “Professor, my brother was killed on that Quidditch pitch. You can’t possibly expect me to enjoy myself there.”  
There was a pause. Teddy thought he saw something soften in Cate’s expression.  
“Come with me, Miss Bowker,” she said, turning around and leading the way back to the Great Hall. It was almost empty by now. “You can go on,” she told Teddy as she walked towards the Ravenclaw table.  
Teddy smiled politely, but continued to follow her. She sat down at the end of the table and indicated for Bowker to take the seat opposite hers. She did so, hesitantly. Teddy sat down next to her.  
“The Quidditch Pitch is not a good place to mourn, Miss Bowker,” Cate said.  
“I didn’t choose it,” Bowker answered curtly.  
“I know. But you should.” There was a pause. “People will tell you that it gets better. That’s not true. You are going to live with this grief for the rest of your life. You have to learn to do it on your terms, not let yourself be controlled by it. There is a right time and place to remember your brother. Find it, or make it. But you should decide where and when.”  
Teddy saw Bowker clench her fist under the table. “It’s not that simple,” she pressed out through gritted teeth.  
“No, it’s not,” Cate agreed. “But it’s necessary. Places don’t have meanings in and of themselves. We give them meaning. Where would you say we are now?”  
Bowker looked around, as if she expected to see something else than the Great Hall, which was completely deserted apart from themselves by now. “At the Ravenclaw table?” she asked.  
“Yes,” Cate said, her face impassive. “Ravenclaws eat here every day, thousands of students have sat, talked, done homework or eaten here. This is also the spot where my brother died in the Battle of Hogwarts.”  
Teddy swallowed. Bowker was sitting up straighter. “I didn’t know that,” she mumbled.  
“Because it’s irrelevant,” Cate said. “I have places where I remember him. This is where I eat. I wasn’t even here when it happened.” She got up.  
“Do I have to go to the match?” Bowker asked.  
“Of course not.”  
“Then I’ll go down to the common room now.” She left the Great Hall. Teddy stood up as well. He wasn’t sure what to say. He and Cate slowly made their way out of the castle.  
“I know you think I don’t care about my students,” she said. “That’s not true.”  
“I don’t think that,” Teddy protested. “I just think there’s a nicer way to say stuff like this.”  
“Yes, which is why they like you better. But they respect me.”  
“You think they don’t respect me?” Teddy asked, a little affronted.  
She raised her eyebrows. “Didn’t you say Louis Weasley used his Veela Charm to try and embarrass you in class?”  
“That is not what I said!”  
“Did he?” she pressed.  
His silence was answer enough. She smirked.  
“At least they trust me,” Teddy persisted.  
“Good for you. But now that I think about it. Sometimes boys do start acting weirdly when he is around. I just never made the connection. You should talk to Filius about this.”  
Teddy sighed. They had almost reached the stands. The match hadn’t started yet, but there was already a lot of noise. They were about to part ways to join their respective houses, when Teddy stopped.  
“Cate,” he said, “don’t call werewolf children cubs. It dehumanizes them and it trivializes their condition.  
She looked at him for a second, a little surprised at the sudden change of subject. “Ok,” she said, and turned around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it. As always, I'm incredibly happy about feedback, so thank you for reading and leaving kudos or commenting!


	6. Cracks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a conversation about the meaning of places Teddy has questions.

It got better. Everything got better with a little distance from the full moon.  
On Monday, Teddy realized he had done all his essay-marking and had a completely free afternoon. He went down to the greenhouses. It was bitter cold outside; he had to melt himself a way through the snow. All lessons outside were suspended due to the weather, but Neville was of course still looking after his plants, whistling happily when Teddy entered.  
“Merlin, it’s freezing outside,” Teddy said. “I brought you tea.”  
Neville beamed. “Thank you. Nice hair.”  
Teddy had let his hair grow to his shoulders to keep his ears warm. “Thanks.”  
“You should add a beard,” Neville suggested, while stroking the petals of a very agitated looking plant.  
Teddy frowned and forced his facial hair out of its pores. “Like that?” he asked.  
Neville looked at him and started to laugh. Teddy sat down on an empty stool and watched Neville work. When he had still been a student he had sometimes done that, come down to the greenhouses and kept Neville company. Neville never asked many questions, but he always gave you that feeling, that you could confide in him, if there was anything on your mind. And if not, he’d just fuss around and talk soothingly to his plants.  
“So, I have a question,” Teddy said after a while.  
“Shoot,” Neville said, now clipping the branches of some other plant. Teddy couldn’t remember their names. His Herbology lessons seemed such a long time ago.  
“About the Battle of Hogwarts,” Teddy said.  
Neville stopped humming. He turned around, took off his protective gloves and sat down at the working table across from Teddy, taking the tea mug Teddy had brought him. He pointed his wand at it to reheat it. “OK,” he said.  
“Do you – do you know where exactly my parents died?” Teddy asked.  
Neville looked at his mug, he nodded absentmindedly. “Not you mother. But I carried your father into the Great Hall. We found him in the courtyard.”  
Teddy nodded. “Yeah, I just knew it was outside. Kingsley told me about it once.”  
“Yes, it’s his story,” Neville said.  
“What do you mean?”  
“Just. I don’t know. Sometimes after the ceremony on commemoration day we’d go out to the Three Broomsticks, you know Order and DA people, and after a few drinks Kingsley would always talk about how Remus died. Hermione says we’ve all got that one death that haunts us more than others. Not necessarily because we were particularly close to that person. For Kingsley it’s your father.”  
“Why?” Teddy asked.  
Neville shrugged. “I’m not sure. He saw a lot of people get killed. Remus was probably the first casualty of the Battle, from what we found out later. We knew we’d get hurt, but we never expected that many people to die. I think maybe seeing Remus die so early in the fight may have made Kingsley realize how much trouble we were in.”  
“What was yours?” Teddy asked. “Who affected you the most?” He looked at Neville cautiously, hoping he was not digging too deep. Neville was one of the Battle survivors who minded being asked questions the least.  
Neville took a sip of his tea and took his time setting the mug back onto the table.  
“Lila,” he said slowly. “She was a first year when I was in sixth. I found her crying in a corridor during the first week of term, because she’d gotten lost and couldn’t find her way back to her common room. So I gave her a chocolate frog, told her that it was nothing to be ashamed of, because I had gotten lost until around fourth year, and then showed her the way. Throughout the school year she always gave me a shy wave when she saw me in the corridors or the Great Hall, but we never spoke again. I think she was a bit intimidated when she saw I was friends with Harry Potter. She didn’t return to Hogwarts the following year. I guessed she was Muggle-born and had gone into hiding. I heard her name in a report about recent deaths on the radio shortly before Christmas.”  
There was a silence. Teddy looked up to see tears running down Neville’s face.  
“We let them down,” Neville continued quietly. “All those Muggle-born kids, who were caught between two worlds as it was, who were excited but also scared to enter our world and come to Hogwarts, because they didn’t know what to expect. We took them into our world, away from their families and friends, knowing that they could never truly return to their old lives. We promised their parents to look after them and keep them safe, and then we let them down.”  
Teddy thought of Lila. She had been the same age Lily was now, and in his mind she looked like Gracie.  
“The latest popular opinion is – as I’m sure you’re aware –“ Neville said, “that we are beyond pureblood-supremacy, and that there is no need to talk about someone’s blood status at all. That we should just treat everyone the same. That’s wrong, though. Muggle-borns will always have a disadvantage, and we have to be aware of that. We take them out of their world into ours when they are children. We can’t just leave them alone with that. We have a responsibility for them, especially we teachers.”  
Teddy didn’t know what to say. Neville looked at him almost pleadingly, and Teddy felt as though he was intruding on something private. He’d always known Neville outside of school of course, but he still mostly thought of him as his old teacher. He’d never seen him so vulnerable.  
His thoughts must have shown, because Neville cleared his throat and mumbled “sorry”.  
“Don’t,” Teddy said. “It’s OK.”  
“I – er – I don’t know where your mother died, Teddy, but I think Bill might.”  
“Bill?” Teddy asked surprised.  
“Yeah, I think someone told me he was with her when she was killed.”  
“Why wouldn’t he have told me that?” Teddy asked.  
“You know how it is, most people don’t like talking about the war. Don’t take it personal.”  
Teddy nodded. “Thanks.”  
“And on a slightly more cheerful note: Would you mind being responsible for the Gryffindors this Saturday night? Hannah and I have plans.”  
“Sure, no problem.”

On Saturday night Teddy was sitting in his office, treating himself to some Firewhisky, because he had finished marking the seventh-year’s essays, and hoping that the students weren’t going to make any trouble, when there was a knock on the door.  
“Yes,” he sighed.  
The door opened and Fred entered. “We have a situation.”  
No, please, Teddy thought, not a situation. “Can’t you handle it?” he asked desperately.  
Fred smiled. “Sorry.”  
“Hufflepuffs or Gryffindors?” Teddy asked.  
“Three Gryffindors and a Ravenclaw.”  
“Brilliant.” Teddy got up and followed Fred, who led him up to the seventh-floor corridor.  
As it turned out, James, Louis, Lucy and one of her friends had decided to decorate the walls of the seventh- and sixth-floor corridors by painting them.  
Teddy sighed, he was still getting used to this part of teaching. “Sixty points from Gryffindor, and twenty points from Ravenclaw,” he said. “And detention, which starts right now. You task is to clean the walls up again.”  
“I didn’t even do anything!” James protested. “I was just standing watch.”  
“Obviously not very well,” Teddy commented dryly.  
“Are you going to write to our parents?” Lucy asked innocently.  
“No. I know you and Roxanne have a bet on whose parents get the most letters this year.” He turned to Fred. “Could you supervise Lucy and Jordan on the sixth floor?”  
“Sure,” Fred answered. He lowered his voice. “You know, I’ll bet anything my sister was involved in this. But she’s nowhere to be found.”  
“I’ll tell Professor Longbottom. He can decide what to do.”  
Fred took Lucy and her friend downstairs. Teddy conjured himself a chair.  
“Well, get started,” he told James and Louis, sitting down.  
“I’m not removing this,” Louis said, horrified. “It’s art!”  
“It’s also vandalism.”  
Louis snorted and took off to the other end of the corridor.  
“Louis!” Teddy called.  
“Let him,” James said, as Louis disappeared around the corner. “He’s had a bad day. I can clean it up.”  
“What happened?” Teddy asked.  
James rolled his eyes. “Boyfriend trouble.”  
“Oh.” Teddy contemplated Louis’s painting. “Well, it is quite good.”  
James laughed. “Are you feeling guilty?” he asked. “He really does get under your skin, doesn’t he?”  
“No,” Teddy said, indignantly.  
“Look, Louis knew it wouldn’t be allowed to stay up. But you know how he is; he needs a bit of drama.” James started to move his wand over the wall. The colours vanished around the places the wand touched. “Don’t take it personally.”  
“Is there another way?” Teddy asked. “He hates me.”  
“Nah, he doesn’t. He’s just disappointed.”  
“How?”  
“Well, you were his hero, weren’t you? He looked up to you. And, you know, when his dad left his mum, he was so angry with him, and never ever wanted to be like him. So, you became his role-model. And when you broke up with Victoire, he had some sort of existential crisis, because if even someone like you could break his sister’s heart, then how could he become a decent person? Like, I know he can come across as arrogant and so annoying, but he’s actually just really insecure and scared he’s going to hurt people.”  
Teddy remembered how Louis had hardly ever left Victoire and him alone when he’d been younger. At one point, Victoire had been so annoyed that she had locked Louis in his room. Teddy had freed him as soon as she had told him.  
He watched James working his way quickly across the wall, vanishing all of Louis’s painting, and wondered how one person could be so immature and wise at the same time.  
James finished quicker than Teddy had expected. He came over to where Teddy was sitting, lifted Teddy’s chin up and said “Hey, don’t be sad. You’re still my hero.”  
Teddy smiled in spite of himself, and swatted away James’s hand. He got up and vanished his chair again.  
“So, what do we do now?” James asked.  
“I’m going back to my office, and you can go to Gryffindor tower and not make any more trouble tonight.”  
“Great, I’ll come with you,” James said, pretending as if he hadn’t heard the second half of Teddy’s sentence.  
Teddy didn’t argue. If James put his mind to something, it was difficult to talk him out of it, and Teddy didn’t really mind not having to spend the evening alone.  
They arrived in Teddy’s office. Teddy took his glass and the bottle of Firewhisky from his desk and put them on the small table in front of the fireplace. He had recently acquired it together with a little sofa and a small armchair. It made a cosier spot for long evenings, or in case a student came by to talk.  
Teddy sat down on the sofa, while James walked over to the fireplace and took a glass from the mantelpiece.  
“James, I can’t let you have any, you know that, right?” Teddy asked.  
James scoffed. “Come on, I’m of-age, and it’s the weekend.”  
Teddy shook his head. James sat down next to Teddy, filled his glass and took a sip, before Teddy had the chance to stop him. He leaned in and whispered “I swear I won’t tell anyone” into Teddy’s ear.  
Teddy sighed resigned and leaned back.  
“You’ve changed, you know that?” James said.  
“How so?” Teddy asked.  
“I don’t know. You used to be louder, funnier. You don’t seem as happy as you used to.”  
“Yeah, I wonder why that is,” Teddy mumbled darkly.  
“It must get lonely here,” James said sliding just a little bit closer.  
“It does,” Teddy said, even though he knew what James was up to. The truth was that he’d been terribly lonely for weeks now and it felt nice to have someone here with him.  
“Well, you shouldn’t be lonely,” James whispered much too close now.  
No, Teddy agreed. And when James kissed him he knew he was doomed. But it felt so good -

Teddy met Bill in the Three Broomsticks the next day. He was a little nervous about it. Even though he knew that Bill was generally much more chilled than Fleur, he still hadn’t seen him much since he and Victoire had broken up, and he knew that fathers could get a bit irrational where their daughters were concerned. Bill, however, greeted Teddy as kindly as ever. He’d already ordered butterbeer for both of them.  
“So, how’s Hogwarts these days?” Bill asked.  
“Oh, well, you know the castle, nothing ever really changes,” Teddy shrugged.  
“Is my boy behaving?”  
“Not really,” Teddy admitted.  
Bill chuckled. “Guess that’s our fault. He’s the youngest, so we spoilt him.”  
Teddy grinned.  
“Anyway,” Bill said, “you wrote you wanted to ask me something?”  
Teddy swallowed. “Yes, actually. If that’s OK. I had a question – about the Battle of Hogwarts.”  
“Oh,” Bill said taken aback. “OK. I thought it would be something werewolf-related to be honest.”  
“Yeah, no. I – I pretty much know everything there is to know about werewolves. I’ve been wondering lately where exactly my parents died, and Neville said you might know about my mum.”  
Bill froze in the act of bringing his butterbeer to his lips. It hovered a few inches over the table for a moment, before he set it back down.  
“Why do you want to know now?” he asked. There was something in his voice that Teddy had never heard before, but he couldn’t say what it was.  
“I don’t know. I’ve been thinking a lot about my parents lately, you know – with everything that’s happened, and being back at Hogwarts I just – I wanted to know.”  
Bill nodded. “The first staircase leading up from the Entrance Hall,” he said.  
“How do you know?” Teddy asked. “Were you with her?”  
Bill nodded again.  
“Why did you never tell me?” Teddy asked.  
Bill didn’t answer. He sat in silence for a while, gaze fixed on a wet stain Teddy’s cold butterbeer bottle had left on the wooden table. Then he got up.  
“Excuse me for a moment,” he muttered and left for the bathroom.  
Teddy sat and waited, drank some of his butterbeer, until Bill returned. A crease had appeared between his eyebrows. He sat back down, and drew a deep breath.  
“Look, Teddy,” he said, his voice uncharacteristically soft, “here’s the story:  
“Before the Battle started, your father asked me to take care of you and your mother in case he wouldn’t make it, and he promised the same for Fleur in return. Then we split up, and I didn’t see him again, but I saw Kingsley later and for some reason I asked him where Remus was – I don’t even remember why – and he told me he’d been killed. And a few minutes later I ran into your mother, and I thought she was at home, she wasn’t even supposed to be at the Battle, I hadn’t expected to see her there. So, she asked me had I seen Remus, and I was just – I wasn’t quick enough – and she saw it. She saw it in my eyes - or whatever, but she knew. She knew he was dead.” Bill’s voice cracked. He took the bottle of butterbeer in his hands, as if for support. “And then Bellatrix came and took her by surprise,” he continued quietly. “She had let her guard down, and she fell.” He looked up at Teddy, looked him in the eyes, and Teddy saw an old man who was terrified but also relieved to finally tell the truth. “It was my fault, Teddy,” he whispered. “I promised your father to take care of her, and instead I caused her death.”  
Teddy didn’t know what to say. He looked at Bill’s scarred and pained face – then he got up and turned to leave.  
“Teddy,” he heard Bill plead behind him. “Please, say something.”  
Teddy turned around. “No,” he said slowly. “It’s not my job to make you feel better about yourself right now.”  
And then he left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. If so, please leave kudos and comments. Thank you!


	7. Relief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Teddy deals with the consequences of the last weekend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to Hagzissa for helping me overcome self-doubt and sorting out the structure of this chapter with me.  
> Also, thank you for the feedback I'm getting, it means so much to me!

Teddy was sitting at his desk, marking essays. It was Monday afternoon, and he was trying very hard not to think about what a mess his life currently was, when someone knocked on the door.  
“Yes?” he called.  
It was Neville. Only when he entered did Teddy realize that he had been hoping for Scorpius, who tended to stop by at least once a week for some tea and chocolate.  
“Am I interrupting?” Neville asked.  
“Yes, and please do,” Teddy said, putting his quill down.  
“How was the weekend?” Neville asked.  
“Fine,” Teddy said, sorting through some papers on his desk.  
“Uneventful I hope?”  
“Er – yeah. Apart from one incident –“  
“Fred told me,” Neville sighed. “He suspects Roxanne had something to do with it.”  
“Yeah, so he said.”  
“He always suspects his sister,” Neville chuckled. “And he’s usually right.”  
“How was your weekend?” Teddy asked.  
“Oh, great. Hannah and I had a lovely night. Thank you for covering. So, what was going on with you and James Saturday night?”  
Teddy’s heart skipped a beat, he felt as though he’d just missed a step going up the stairs. Neville was watching him closely. Teddy felt the blood drain from his cheeks.  
“What happened, Teddy?” Neville asked.  
Teddy opened his mouth, even though he had no idea what to say. “I – er – I don’t –“  
Neville let out a groan and buried his face in his hand. “You didn’t.”  
“How -?” Teddy asked.  
Neville looked up again. “Well, James is not the most discrete person, and I pay attention to school gossip. I didn’t think it was true, though.”  
Teddy’s mouth had gone dry. It took him a few tries to get the words out when he asked, “You – you were bluffing?”  
The look Neville gave him made him shrink in his seat. “You sure that’s the first thing you’re going to say to me?”  
Teddy shook his head quickly.  
“Look, Teddy, there were some staff members who were worried about you starting here, saying you were to young. I was one of those who argued for you; don’t make me regret it.”  
Teddy swallowed hard.  
“What happened?” Neville asked. “No, wait. Let me rephrase that: Did anything happen that would have been illegal were James still underage?”  
Teddy bit his lip and nodded.  
Neville nodded. “OK, look, luckily for you, James is seventeen. That makes it legal, still highly unethical, and against school rules though. What on earth were you thinking?”  
“I wasn’t –“ Teddy mumbled.  
“Well clearly!”  
Teddy felt his eyes sting, his vision became blurry. Not now, he told his body angrily.   
“Listen, Teddy, I won’t tell Minerva, and it’s unlikely that it will reach the rest of the staff. But if anything like this ever happens again, I’m going to have to report you, and you will lose this position, and that’s if you’re lucky. If it had been someone below sixteen you could be sent to prison for that, and it’s not just about you; you should think about how that would look, too.”  
“What –“ Teddy cleared his throat, “what do you mean?”  
“What do you think the Prophet would make of it if a werewolf got fired from Hogwarts for sleeping with a student?”  
“What does that have to do with me being a werewolf?” Teddy asked.  
“Nothing, but that’s not how the Prophet is going to sell it.”  
Through the shock, guilt and numbness Teddy was feeling broke the familiar feeling of outrage, and it must have shown on his face.  
“I don’t say I approve, Teddy, you know that,” Neville said. “But it’s the truth.”  
“Maybe,” Teddy said, “but I don’t need a straight white pureblood telling me what it’s like to be minority.”  
Neville’s jaw muscles tensed. “I don’t think you’re in a position to –“  
“To what?” Teddy growled.  
“I didn’t think you’d have to specifically be told to keep your hands off students.”  
“Then report me, get me fired, tell me off, I don’t care!” Teddy said. “But don’t make this about werewolves.”  
Neville got up. “I know it gets lonely here, Teddy,” he said. “Why don’t you take the weekend off. Go back to London or visit your family. Ernie and I will look after the Hufflepuffs.”  
His family. Teddy felt his mouth go dry. “Will you tell Harry?” he asked in a small voice.  
“James is an adult,” Neville said. “So, no.”

Teddy ran into James the next morning when he was leaving his office to go to breakfast.  
“What are you doing here?” Teddy asked.  
“I got your message,” James said. “Came here to tell you not to freak out. No teacher is going to find out.”  
“Neville already did,” Teddy hissed. “I mean Professor Longbottom.”  
James rolled his eyes at Teddy’s correction. “That man pays too much attention for anyone’s good.”  
“James, I could have lost my job! I could still lose it! What the hell were you thinking telling anyone about this?”  
James chose not to answer. “Don’t worry. No one else is going to know. I’ll take care of it.”  
“What about your parents?” Teddy asked, cursing the lump in his throat that James had surely heard.  
“What am I, insane? There not going to hear about this.”  
Teddy was not consoled.  
“Hey, Teddy, I promise. Nothing is going to happen. Just chill out, OK?”  
Teddy bit his lip. “Thanks,” he murmured.  
“I’m going to go to breakfast,” James said.  
“Wait,” Teddy said. “I’m sorry.”  
“Why?” James asked, a familiar grin on his face. “I liked it.” He walked off, and Teddy leaned against the wall, burying his face in his hands.

Teddy had the sixth-years that afternoon and was glad to find that everything was as always with them. Either they hadn’t heard the story or didn’t believe it. Louis’s attitude towards him was as unfriendly as ever, but everyone else was focussed on practicing their shield charms, and James was behaving perfectly normal and unsuspicious.  
Nevertheless, Teddy was relieved when the lesson was over. He went to his office to drop of the student’s essays and found Scorpius waiting in front of the door.  
“Oh, hi,” Teddy said, and let them both in.  
Scorpius settled down on the little sofa and took a cookie from the jar on the table.  
“No chocolate, today?” he asked, a smile playing around his thin lips.  
Teddy chuckled. He set the essays on his desk, pulled a drawer open and took out a box of chocolate, which he placed next to the cookie jar. He sat down in the armchair and closed his eyes for a second.  
“Long day?” Scorpius asked, munching his cookie.  
Teddy nodded. “You?”  
Scorpius shrugged. “Fine.”  
“How was your week?” Teddy asked.  
“Good. Dad sent me a package with sweets for Valentine’s Day and asked me whether I had a date.”  
“Did you?” Teddy asked.  
Scorpius’s eyes widened horrified. “No! No, no, no. No date for me. Albus and I played chess though.”  
“That sounds nice.”  
Scorpius nodded. “Did you?” he asked.  
“What?”  
“Did you have a date?”  
Teddy blinked, surprised.  
Scorpius blushed immediately. “I’m sorry,” he spluttered. “I completely forgot you’re a teacher. I mean – not – I just – I didn’t think. Is it terribly inappropriate?”  
Teddy smiled. “No, I didn’t have a date. Don’t worry, Scorpius. This is a safe place, remember?”  
Scorpius nodded. “Right. So, um, can I ask you something else?”  
“Fire away.”  
“Are you upset about something?”  
“I – what? Why do you ask?”  
“You look upset. And you seemed less happy in class today.”  
“I –“ Teddy forced a smile on his face that was probably not very convincing. “I’m fine. Anyway, it’s not about me here. It’s about you.”  
“Okay,” Scorpius said thoughtfully. “Me. So, today, Albus and I had Defence Against the Dark Arts, and we noticed that our teacher seemed a little upset.”  
“Albus did, too?” Teddy asked. Somehow he didn’t even have the energy to protest.  
“Nah, but he would have if he was a person who notices things.”  
Teddy almost smiled. Scorpius didn’t look as if he was going to drop the subject.  
“I learned some news last weekend, about my mum,” Teddy said slowly. “About how she died, and I’m not sure what to do with it.”  
“Oh.” Scorpius said in a small voice. “I’m sorry.”  
“It’s OK.”  
“You don’t have to talk about it.”  
“I know.” There was a silence. Scorpius took a bar of chocolate, unwrapped it, broke off a piece and pushed the rest towards Teddy. Teddy broke off a piece too. “Do you ever talk about your mum?” he asked.  
Scorpius frowned. “Not really. Dad and I, we don’t really talk about – stuff. And I’m always scared Albus couldn’t handle it.”  
“What would you tell him?”  
Scorpius bit his lip, his hands were constantly twisting in his lap.”  
“I told him about her before she died,” he said. “But we never really talked about the summer when it happened. It’s so strange to think about, because it was so terrible, but I think I also had my happiest moments then. Like everything was just much more intense. There were moments where we were just happy, all three of us, and so close. When the house elf made mum’s favourite food and she managed to eat some of it and keep it down. And when I read to her. And when Dad and I smuggled her favourite Muggle sweets in the hospital to her, even though the Healers didn’t like it. When she beat my Dad at Chess even though she could hardly concentrate, because he’s so bad at it. It was never like that again later. Even when I’m happy now, or I’m laughing with Albus I’m never really not sad about it.  
“But a lot of times it was awful. She was in so much pain. And Dad was so – I don’t know – vulnerable I guess, not like himself at all. The last week, she was asleep most of the time. Dad and I spent nearly all our time with her at the hospital, and at some point I started dreading the moments when she woke up, because she was hurting so bad and I didn’t want to see her like that anymore.  
“And one day, when Dad and I came back from lunch, the Healer caught us in the hallway and told us she’d passed away, and I just remember feeling so relieved, because I knew she’d never have to be in pain again.”  
Scorpius waited a few seconds after he’d finished speaking before he looked back up. Teddy was crying.  
“Oh, no! I didn’t want that! I’m sorry -”  
“No,” Teddy interrupted him. “Don’t, I’m – this – this needed to happen.”  
Scorpius got up. “Should I leave?”  
Teddy nodded.  
“OK.” Scorpius took another cookie and left the office.  
Teddy stayed in the armchair and let it all wash over him. Everything that had happened, everything he’d held back. He thought of a mother who had died in St. Mungo’s, away from her husband and son, and in pain. And he thought of a mother who had died at Hogwarts, away from her husband and son, and in pain. He didn’t know how much time had passed until there were no more tears left, but it felt like a lot.  
He could have gone down to dinner, but instead he sat down at his desk and wrote a letter.

Dear Victoire,  
How are you? I haven’t heard from you in a while, so I assume everything is all right at the office.  
I met your father on Sunday. He told me he was there when my mum died. He told me he accidently let her know that my dad had died, and that’s why she got killed.  
I don’t know what to do with that, Vic. I guess it shouldn’t matter, because it happened over twenty years ago, and it’s not like anything changed, only that I know now. I know a person’s last moments are not more important than any other, but I feel like I have to get used to the fact that those were her last. That the last thing she felt was grief. I don’t know what to think. Or feel.  
And then there’s your dad. I think I really hurt him. He said it was his fault she’d died and I just walked away. I didn’t contradict him. I should have. I mean obviously it wasn’t his fault. It was just too much there and then.  
And I can’t help this feeling that all this time that I was part of your family, all these times they took me in, and let me spend time with you, and made me feel at home there – I’m wondering now if it was only because Bill felt guilty about my mum. And I know that’s probably stupid. It just doesn’t feel very nice.  
I’m going to tell your dad that it wasn’t his fault. I’m going to make it right, I promise.  
I miss you, Vic. I wish you were here.  
We’d sit on the bed in pyjamas and talk all night like we used to when we were kids and I was allowed to sleep over, remember that?  
I hope you’re well.  
Love,  
Teddy

He folded the letter neatly, put it in an envelope and set it on fire with his wand. He didn’t have the right to go to Victoire with his troubles. He watched the flames slowly swallowing the parchment, until it crumbled to dusk on his desk. He let it sit there, stood up and went down to the Great Hall for dinner.  
It was late, so there weren’t many people left in the hall. Ernie MacMillan was still at the staff table, and tried to engage Teddy in a conversation about whether or not Muggle Studies should become a mandatory subject for all students. Normally, Teddy would have had a strong opinion about that, but today he could only vaguely remember which side of the debate he was on, and he also found Ernie slightly annoying at the moment. The good thing about Ernie was that he didn’t seem to mind conversations in which the other party hardly spoke, so it went all right. They left the Hall together after having finished dinner and send the last of the students to their houses. Teddy told Ernie that he needed to use the bathroom. When he was alone, he sat down on the steps of the first staircase leading up from the Entrance Hall.  
He thought of Cate saying that places didn’t have a meaning of their own, and of all the times he’d passed this spot during his time here as both student and teacher, never giving it a second thought.  
And he heard Scorpius’s voice in his head: “I just remember feeling so relieved, because I knew she’d never have to be in pain again.”  
And he hoped he would get there one day, too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let know if you enjoyed it!


	8. Like Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is an explanation why as to this chapter took so long and why it's so short, but I didn't want to fill the notes up with it, so you can find it here if you're interested: https://prinzessinkiwi.tumblr.com/post/168026660823/this-last-chapter-ive-updated-on-my-ao3-story-a

Teddy followed Neville’s advice and left Hogwarts for the weekend. He didn’t visit the Potters, even though Harry had written several times reminding Teddy that he was always welcome there. Instead he stayed with his grandmother, who kept fussing over him and complained that she didn’t get to see Teddy anymore, but whenever she thought Teddy wasn’t looking a fond and almost sappy smile would appear on her face.  
“You’re too thin,” she told him. “How is that even possible? You’re at Hogwarts, for Merlin’s sake! You need to take better care of yourself.”  
Teddy rolled his eyes. “I’m eating a lot, Gran; it’s just the transformations. I’m still getting used to it and it takes a lot of energy.”  
Teddy was glad. At least when she was annoyed with him he knew they were OK. As long as there was no pity involved they were fine.  
He spent the evening in Muggle London. The Wizarding World was sometimes too small and he was too well known for his liking. He’d learned that the hard way when a Witch Weekly reporter had spotted him with another man before his and Victoire’s beak-up had been public knowledge. Luckily, Ginny heard about it before the story was printed, and Bill had time to bribe the newspaper to spare Victoire the humiliation.

He was back at Hogwarts in time for breakfast Monday morning. Cate took one look at him and smirked.  
“Long night?” she asked.  
Teddy groaned. “I think I’m getting old,” he whined.  
“How old are you?”  
“22.”  
She snorted. “Cute.”  
Teddy grumbled. He didn’t want to think about the real reason he was feeling so groggy. Cate had dropped off this month’s badge of Wolfsbane Potion at his office just before he had left for the weekend.  
“Hey, is Weasley doing it again?” Cate asked suddenly.  
“Which Weasley doing what?” Teddy asked without looking up.  
“Louis, using his Veela Charm. The Ravenclaw boys are behaving a bit – odd.”  
Teddy looked over to the Ravenclaw table, and saw possibly the most beautiful person ever. He pressed his fingers against his forehead and shook his head against the impulses that were threatening to take him over.  
“And I guess that’s my answer,” Cate said. She stood up and made her way over to the Ravenclaw table. Teddy thought about following her, but decided she had it under control. When she came back the Ravenclaw table seemed to have settled down again.  
“What did you say?” Teddy asked.  
“I told him he’s in detention tonight, that I will not tolerate mind control or manipulation in any form and that if I ever get wind of him doing this again, he’s going to have a meeting with McGonagall.”  
Teddy nodded. “That sounds fair.”  
She raised her eyebrows. “Well, then I guess I’ve done something wrong. If you think it’s fair, I should have been stricter.”  
Teddy ignored the remark. “Can I have the detention?” he asked.  
“Why? You didn’t do anything,” Cate teased.  
“You know what I mean.”  
“I do, and no, you can’t. I doubt anything you set could be considered a punishment.”  
“Don’t worry. Louis hates me. Just having to spend time with me will seem like a punishment to him.”  
“Then why are you so keen on it?”  
“I want to talk to him. Like, really talk. I don’t think he’s doing so well.”  
“You’re such a Hufflepuff! Fine, take it. I’ve got better things to do with my evening anyway.”

Louis was late. He entered Teddy’s office after knocking with a defiant look as if waiting for Teddy to comment on it. Teddy didn’t. He smiled politely and asked Louis to sit down, gesturing to the little sofa. Louis did so slowly. He crossed his legs and leaned back, but he was fiddling with the hem of his robes.  
There was a silence. It stretched uncomfortably long, both of them seemed to wait for the other to break it. Teddy was the first to speak.  
“So, Louis. Do you know why you’re here?”  
“Because I turned on my Veela Charm,” Louis answered in a bored voice.  
“And that is wrong because -?”  
“Because using it on my classmates violates their free will.”  
“Yes. Same thing goes for your teachers.”  
“Yes,” Louis said. “Great. Understood. Can I go now?”  
“No, not quite. I’d like to talk to you.”  
“What if I don’t want to talk?” Louis asked.  
“Well, detention is not really about what you want, is it?” Teddy said. “But if you prefer, I can start and you can listen.”  
Louis shrugged. “Whatever.”  
Teddy suddenly wished he had something in his hands. When he’d counselled werewolves he’d usually had a clipboard and quill to take notes. He missed those.  
“Do you know the difference between being family and being like family?” he asked, not waiting for an answer. “You don’t have to do anything to be family. You just have to be born to the right people, and you can’t usually lose that status. Even if you screw up really badly, you will still be family. There are few things you can do to lose that tie. But being like family, that you have to earn. And you can lose it again. I mean, it’s not all that bad, it means that it’s a compliment to get that status. You can be a huge douchebag and still be considered family, but if someone says you’re like family to them it actually means they think you’re a good person.  
“Your parents might have been friends with mine, and I might be an honorary Weasley because Harry is my godfather, but I don’t think your parents would have allowed me over as much and told me they thought of me like family, if I had not been this mostly nice, considerate and polite boy, who offered to babysit you, and made sure Dominique didn’t fall off her broom when we played Quidditch, helped your mum in the kitchen like the good boy my grandmother raised me to be, who was a prefect and Head Boy and looked out for the smaller Weasleys at Hogwarts. And I liked being that boy. It’s not like I was playing a role, I am mostly a good person I think. But I think I was also aware of the fact that it always felt like I had to be like that to earn my position in this family. And that meant I could lose it, too.  
“When Victoire finished school, and I started to figure out that I couldn’t stay with her, I knew that I wouldn’t just break up with her. I’d also break up with her family. Because in the end, I’m not family. She is. And if there was a choice between me and her, you’d stick with her, as you should. And you could say that it shouldn’t matter, because I still had my gran and the Potters. But it’s not that easy. I know I was lucky that I had so many people who treated me like family, but while none of them could replace my parents, each of them gave me a different feeling of what family could be. Your family gave me a unique place among you that was never the same as the one I had with the Potters or my gran. And I knew that by breaking up with Victoire I would give that up. That’s why it took me so long, and it was the hardest thing I ever did. Your parents might still write to me and tell me I’m still welcome with them, but it’s not the same. And it never will be.  
“I can’t help but feeling that if your anger at me was really only because of Victoire, you would be spending your energy on supporting her, rather than on constantly showing me just how disappointed you are in me. If it’s not about Victoire, if it’s about you, then this is me telling you that I’m here, and that I will listen to you and try not to judge. If your only goal in this is to hurt me, then I can tell you: You’re succeeding; you’re hurting me.  
“But I’ve known you all your life, Louis, and I know you’re not that kind of person. You’re not cruel. Don’t pretend to be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do expect the next chapter not to take that long. Until then, feel free to leave feedback, I'm always grateful for that.


	9. Imperfection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Teddy can't help a fellow werewolf. Neville talks about his favourite teacher.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to Hagzissa, who has been supportive and patient as ever, and who raced me to who would finish their next chapter first (I won!)

Louis seemed to have shrunken where he sat. He avoided Teddy’s eyes. After a moment Teddy stood up, deciding that Louis could do with some privacy. He walked over to the window and looked out. The room had a perfect view of the Whamping Willow, which stood isolated and still in the dark night, melting snow dripping from its leaves.  
After a minute or so, he heard a clanking that told him that Louis had taken a sip of tea, and felt it was safe to return. He sat down opposite Louis again. They looked at each other, almost curiously.  
“I don’t want to hurt people,” Louis said.  
“I know. You’re a good person, Louis,” Teddy said patiently.  
“But then how come I do bad things?” Louis asked, there was a note of desperation in his voice.  
“Sometimes good people do bad things. No one is perfect.”  
“Then what does it even mean? To be a good person?”  
“It means what you said. It means that you don’t want to hurt people. Sometimes you still will. But you will see that you were wrong, and try to do better next time. That makes you a good person.”  
“Maybe that’s not enough.”  
Teddy let out a small sigh. “Maybe it has to be.”

“So, Joy, what can I do for you?” Teddy asked, while the kettle floated through the air and poured them both tea.  
The girl on the couch cleared her throat. “I wanted to ask for your advice. I’ve been thinking about making my status public knowledge at the school.”  
Teddy, taken aback, looked at her for a few moments, startled. “Really?” he asked.  
“Yes,” she answered calmly. “I believe now that you are here, I will not be able to keep it a secret much longer. I think that my friends might have suspected it for some time anyway. People will start to figure out that I’m always sick at the same time you go through a full moon. And frankly, I don’t like having to lie and hiding things. It’s not how I want to live my life.”  
Teddy nodded. “I understand that. Have you spoken to your parents about this?”  
“No, they won’t understand.”  
“Yes, that was the impression I got from their letters. They, too, seemed concerned my presence at the school might make some people suspect your status, but their proposed solution was rather different.”  
“I’m sorry,” Joy said. “I didn’t mean to get you into trouble. My parents can be a bit –,“ she hesitated, “overprotective.”  
“Don’t worry about it. Angry letters are an occupational hazard.”  
“Of teaching?” Joy asked doubtfully.  
“No,” Teddy said without thinking, “of – never mind.” He cleared his throat. “I think it’s a very brave decision. But it can be a difficult thing to do when you don’t have family support. If you want, you can talk to Dominique from the Foundation about it. She often helps out in cases like this.”  
“Why can’t you help me? It’s your foundation, you’re here, and you know what it’s like first-hand.”  
“I don’t work at the Foundation at the moment. I’m still President of the Board, yes, but that only means making sure we have enough money to keep it running. I’m not involved with cases. And I have decided not to counsel werewolves for at least the first year after becoming one.”   
A flicker of disappointment appeared on Joy’s face.  
“I’m sorry,” Teddy said. “Like I said, I’m sure Dominique will be able to help you. She has much more experience with this than I do.”  
“Yes,” Joy said getting up, “but she doesn’t really know what it’s like, does she?”

Teddy was sitting at his desk marking essays. It was Friday, the day of the full-moon, he had a splitting headache and was so exhausted that his vision was blurry. He squinted to make out the writing on Hugo Granger-Weasley’s essay on trolls. The boy had an awful handwriting. Teddy sighed, put down the parchment and rubbed his eyes furiously. He took a deep breath shook his head, cracked his neck, and was about to pick up Hugo’s homework again, when there was a knock on the door. It opened before he could answer, and Neville entered, head bowed, his eyes on a stack of parchment he was carrying. Teddy cleared his throat. Neville looked up, startled, stopping half-way between the door and Teddy’s desk.  
“Teddy. What are you doing?” he asked  
“I’m working,” Teddy said. “What are you doing?”  
“Oh, I just wanted to drop off the homework I collected from your sixth-years. Why are you working? Shouldn’t you be in bed or something? You look awful.”  
“Thanks,” Teddy mumbled as Neville dumped the pile of essays on his desk. “I just – I have so much to do. I really need to mark those essays. I want to hand them back next week, and I probably won’t be able to do anything tomorrow, and –“ he scrambled through the papers on his desk to see how many there were left to mark.  
“Teddy,” Neville interrupted him. “Look at me.”  
Teddy looked up. He had difficulties getting Neville’s concerned face into focus.  
“You are in no fit state to work. There’s reason why you had the day off. It is in absolutely no one’s interest that you overexert yourself and become ill. If you want to be a good teacher, get some rest and make sure you’re back on your feet in time for lessons on Monday.”  
Teddy let out a conceding groan and put his head on his desk. The surface was pleasantly cool against his hot cheeks.  
“Come on, let’s get you to bed,” Neville said, tugging gently at Teddy’s shoulder.  
“No,” Teddy whined, very much aware that he sounded like a little child, but to be honest, he felt like one too. “Not the bed.”  
“The couch?” Neville suggested.  
“Fine.” Teddy got up, walked over to the couch and lay down. He was much to tall for it, which meant that his legs were dangling down the side of it from his knees downward.  
“Can I bring you some dinner?” Neville asked.  
Teddy had already closed his eyes. He nodded. “And can you turn down the lights?” he asked.  
“Sure.” The room behind his closed eyelids darkened. He heard Neville’s footsteps, then the door and then there was silence.  
Not for long. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but it felt as though he couldn’t have dosed off for more than five minutes or so, when a bright light flushed the room. He screwed up his face.  
“Oh, shit, sorry,” he heard someone whisper, and the light was gone again. He opened his eyes and glanced around. Fred was standing next to his desk in the semi-darkness of his office, his wand in one hand and a bag in the other. “Sorry, Teddy. I didn’t see you there.”  
“’S okay,” Teddy mumbled sleepily. “What’s up?”  
“I just wanted to drop off the second-years’ homework.”  
Teddy groaned. More homework. “Thanks. How was it?”  
“Oh, great. The Slytherins are surprisingly sweet.”  
“I know, right?” Teddy slowly tried to sit up. His neck and back felt stiff, he winced.  
“You OK?” Fred asked. “You look terrible.”  
“So I’ve been told,” Teddy said dryly.  
“If you want I could –“  
They were interrupted by a knock on the half-open door, which opened fully immediately.  
“I don’t understand why people knock without waiting for an answer,” Teddy complained as Roxanne entered. “I mean, what’s the point of knocking then?”  
Roxanne didn’t reply. Her eyes were resting on her brother. Both of their postures had stiffened at the sight of each other.  
“Weasley,” Roxanne said curtly.  
“What?” Fred snapped.  
“Spare me the dramatics, you two, please,” Teddy groaned. “I’m too tired for this.”  
Fred crossed his arms before his chest, and looked pointedly somewhere else than where his sister was standing. Roxanne’s hand was moving towards her wand pocket.  
“Don’t even think about it, Roxanne,” Teddy growled.  
She frowned, but folded her hands behind her back instead.  
“Why are you here?” Teddy asked.  
Roxanne cleared her throat and looked briefly over to her brother to indicate that she didn’t want to say it in front of him.  
“Fine. Fred, what were you going to say?”  
But Fred seemed equally hesitant to speak in her presence.  
“Really?” Teddy asked, exasperated. “You two have got to be kidding me. I’m not in the mood to deal with this right now.”  
“It’s OK,” Fred said. “I’ll come back some other time.” He took his bag and pushed past Roxanne towards the door.  
“Hang on,” Teddy called after him, when Fred had already left the room. “Didn’t you want to leave the essays?”  
But Fred didn’t respond.  
Roxanne closed the door.  
“What the hell?” Teddy asked.  
“What?” Roxanne asked back as if nothing had happened.  
“I heard you two were in detention on Wednesday because you were duelling each other in the common room.”  
Roxanne shrugged. “What can I say? He’s an idiot. I had to hex him.”  
“But –“  
“I though you weren’t in the mood to discuss this.”  
“You’re right; I’m not. Why are you here?”  
“I wanted to make sure you’re all set for tonight.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“I mean, do you have someone to keep you company?”  
Teddy felt his hands starting to fidget with one of the cushions on the couch. “No,” he said, avoiding Roxanne’s gaze.  
“Do you want me to get someone for you?”  
“No, I’ll be fine.” Teddy scratched the back of his neck.  
“Look, you were scared out of your mind last month. I think you should have someone with you tonight. And I can’t be here this time. I’ve already had three detentions this week, I don’t want to risk another one and frankly, I’ve got a lot of homework to do.”  
“Oh, please,” Teddy scoffed. “You don’t give a damn about detentions or homework.”  
“Yeah, OK, I have a date. It doesn’t matter. The point is I can’t stay with you tonight.”  
“I’m not asking you to. Look, I’ll be fine. Go on your date. Say hi to your girlfriend from me.”  
“No, I’m not going to do that. You’re our teacher.”  
“Right, yeah, whatever. I’ll be OK.”  
“I can get Professor Longbottom if you want,” Roxanne persisted.  
“I don’t need you to get anyone. I’m OK.”  
“I don’t feel comfortable leaving you alone. You can tell me who to get or else I’ll tell Professor Longbottom.”  
“Tell me what?” Neville had just opened the door. He was levitating a tray with two full plates on it next to him.  
“Ah, hello, Professor Longbottom,” Roxanne greeted him brightly.  
“You see,” Teddy said, “nothing to worry about. You should go to dinner.”  
She nodded. “Good luck for tonight,” she said and left, closing the door behind herself.  
“What was that about?” Neville asked, putting the tray down onto the small coffee table and handing Teddy a plate.  
“Oh, nothing important. Thank you.”  
Neville settled down in the armchair with the other plate.  
“Fred was here a minute ago,” Teddy said, cutting his steak.  
“At the same time as Roxanne?” Neville asked.  
Teddy nodded.  
“Ouch.”  
“Yep.”  
“I’m thinking about writing their parents about it. But I’m not sure if that’s just going to make things worse.”  
“I don’t know,” Teddy said. “I don’t understand those two. I always wanted to have siblings. I thought it would be easier to have someone in the same boat as you when your parents aren’t there the way you’d need them to.”  
Neville nodded. “Yeah, me too. But then again, what do we know about that?”  
“True,” Teddy agreed, putting down his knife and fork.  
“Not hungry?” Neville asked.  
“I don’t know. The steak is a bit – overcooked, don’t you think?”  
“No,” Neville said, smiling while he took a bite of his own steak. “I don’t, actually.”  
“What?” Teddy asked. “Why are you laughing?”  
“I just remembered that one time I was at the Potters’ for dinner when you were about seven or something and you watched Harry make steaks and told him when to take out yours, and he thought it was so disgusting that you would eat meat that was still mostly raw.”  
“Merlin, yes, every time, every single time he made fun of me about that. Still does, actually.”  
“It was adorable,” Neville sniggered.  
Teddy shook his head and put his plate to the side. He leaned back, massaging his temples with his index and middle fingers.  
“Busy week?” Neville asked.  
“Yeah.”  
“I hear you get a lot of visits from students.”  
“Just a few, who needed advice or – you know – tea, chocolate, someone to talk to.”  
“They trust you.”  
“I hope so. I’m really behind on everything else, because of it. It’d be good if it was worth it.”  
“Merlin, Teddy, you are so much like your father.”  
Teddy shook his head. “I don’t know. I feel like I’m – constantly making mistakes, and on the verge of screwing up.”  
“You’re proving my point.”  
Teddy raised his head again to look at Neville, questioningly.  
“I don’t think your father knew or appreciated what an excellent teacher he was. But he was. The best I ever had.”  
Teddy let out a sigh of exasperation.  
“You don’t believe me?”  
“No, I just – it’s something people who want to be nice say to orphans about their parents to make them feel better.”  
“I’m aware of that,” Neville said quietly. “People are always greater when their gone. And you don’t have to believe anyone when they say that Remus was the best teacher they ever had, especially not Harry, ‘cause everyone knows for him it was Dumbledore. But you should believe me. During the year Remus was teaching here I wasn’t always in a very good place. And he had tea and chocolate and a place to talk. One Saturday when everyone was in Hogsmeade and I wasn’t allowed to go, because I had sort of screwed up, we sat here in this office and he told me about my parents. About their time at school together. He told me about how my dad had been incredibly shy when he’d started school, and always stuttered terribly when a teacher asked him a question. I think it was the first time someone talked to me about my parents without gushing about how wonderful and perfect they had been. And do realise that that’s exactly what I am doing to you right now. But the truth is that he helped me become the person I am now, and ever since I’ve taken the post here, I’ve tried to live up to his example. And I think it’s remarkable that someone who was so good at seeing potential and strength in other people seems to have been unable for the most part to see it in himself.”  
Teddy didn’t answer. Neville continued eating, while Teddy looked over to his desk, imagining his father and little Neville Longbottom drinking tea there and talking about Neville’s parents. It was a nice picture. He sighed and let his head sink back against the wall behind him.  
“Are you sure you don’t want to go to bed?” Neville asked. “You look like you’ll fall asleep any minute now.”  
“No,” Teddy mumbled, “if I go to bed I won’t make it out of there until the transformation.”  
“OK. Why should you?”  
“Took me almost a week to get all the hair out of it last time.”  
Neville made a noise that sounded as though he was trying not to snort into his food.  
“D’you mind if I lie down here for a bit again?” Teddy asked.  
“Please, it’s your office.”  
Teddy let himself fall to the side and put his feet back up.  
He heard the clatter of a knife and fork against a plate. Neville seemed to be getting up.  
“Well, I guess, I’ll –“  
“Are you leaving?” Teddy asked much to quickly, his eyes wide open again. He cursed himself a second later for his reaction.  
Neville had stopped and was watching Teddy closely, his face completely passive.  
“No,” he said after a few seconds, “I just thought I’d take a look at those essays I collected from the sixth-years.”  
He stepped over to Teddy’s desk.  
“You don’t have to do that,” Teddy said.  
“Oh, I know,” Neville assured him, sitting down behind the desk and taking the first essay from the pile. He smiled at Teddy. “It’s OK. You can go to sleep. I’ll just sit here and mark some homework.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please remember to leave kudos and/or comments if you liked this. Thank you!


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